Street vendors

So yesterday I was in my car again as I had to deliver documents to a client. (I won't go into how sad I was and how much longer it took not being on the bike - that is a story for another time.) I noticed something very funny in front of me.

It would appear that the vendors who sell car cell phone chargers, super glue, caps, and fruit know which the soft targets is, or they just get a kick out of hassling people.

Yesterday, we were all stuck in a long queue of cars waiting for what seemed like an age, creeping slowly down the road towards the traffic light, giving ample time to the sellers to annoy all and sundry when I noticed that the lady in front of me was being harassed by every single seller, and yet I was not being approached by even one.

This is my theory:

I always look grumpy, and or busy, and or frightening, and if one of them makes the mistake of asking me how much his wares cost I either flatly ignore them, or if in a foul mood, I shout that I don't fucking care, and to fuck off and leave me alone.

I used to be all sweet and greet these people, and then I realised that no matter how polite you are, they don't care about anything other than you buying something, and if you are talking, you are a potential customer until you ignore them or be rude. This is unfortunate, but seems to be a fact.

I no longer greet these people, and ignore them as if they don't exist. This makes them ignore me back, which suits me just fine. This brings me back to the lady in front of me. For starters, she had her window open. Rookie mistake number one. If your window is open, you are fair game, and no matter what you say, these guys are going to talk to you and sell you whatever they have, and try to barter with you about the price. Secondly, she was being all sweet and greeting every person, then saying kindly and politely, no thank you, I don't need any pumice stone, any peaches, any cheap sun glasses, a handmade cloth, etc.

Of course, this just eggs them on. If you actually speak to them, this seems to indicate the beginning of a negotiation. I could see her getting more and more angry and shaking her head vigorously at each consecutive person, and could hear her getting louder and louder with each respective request. Eventually, she was almost crying. I was crying, but with laughter.

I think these sellers secretly enjoy winding up the car drivers, and probably take a bet on how many people they can upset in an hour, and try to beat their own totals in a day.

How the hell else are you supposed to keep yourself amused if that is all you have to do all day?