EarthTraveller

Geeks are all around us

2011-01-17T20:10:00.002+02:00

So My husband sent me this link this evening and said that if he didn;t find me first this is the type of guy who would have snapped me up. Lovely...

http://notalwaysright.com/love-a-jedi-shall-know/9507

Blue Cheese

2010-07-15T23:50:00.004+02:00

What do you get when you cross a technophobe with a deaf twit? A blue cheese dongle. Lol. No seriously, I was talking to my Mom about a Blue tooth dongle that I need to make my phone talk to my laptop so I can synchronise my calendar and mail contacts etc, and after a momentary silence, she asked me what a blue cheese dongle was.

It, like so many other humorous made up words, has made its way into our everyday language, and always amuses me and my husband when we talk about these things using our “private” in-jokes, and people correct us thinking we are mistaken and wanting to teach us the correct words.

So what’s next?

2010-07-15T23:50:00.003+02:00

The World came, and saw, and then conquered us, then left – with the teams flying out only hours after their final matches. This surprised me. I thought that people were going to stay and spend their money looking at our “stuff” and visiting all the cool places, but I guess they didn’t want to. Can’t say I am surprised though. I have had a look in the shops, and I do see that the so-called World Cup merchandise was horrifically overpriced, and is on sale from up to 50% off. Perhaps even the tourists with their money going so much further than ours found the paraphernalia too dear.

At least the roads were bliss with our shiny bright new highways in working order. I can’t wait til they are fully operational.

Crazy cat lady

2010-07-15T23:50:00.001+02:00

I now live with 7 cats. You may think that sounds like I am a crazy cat lady, but it is true. It is a mixed blessing, because we also have to share the space with 3 small dogs, which have a healthy respect for the cats – two of whom regularly punch or claw the dogs just to ensure their reign of terror continues.

So there we were sitting at our computers, playing one or other of our LAN games, when we suddenly heard a hissing and a yelping. I turned my head just in time to see our medium sized grey cat (Michelle, smelly belly) hitting the little black doggie – Chrissie. Now Chrissie is the sweetest dog, and her only sin was walking into the study to sit at the feet of her master, but Michelle decided that she was sitting on the box and no dogs were allowed to pass. Either that or the dog was too close, or she was grumpy, or who knows what else… but Chrissie was set right good and proper.

Another such incident – Ash (the fattest cat in the whole of Edenglen), walked into the room to see if she could cause my husband to pick her up onto his lap by clawing him until he picked her up out of exasperation, when Michelle decided to jump down off the desk and hit her in the face twice. It was the funniest thing. I could hear the knock on her little head and she kind of shook her head as one may do after a fall. Michelle then turned tail and ran.

But Michelle is a causer, and I worry about her because she is always full of sores. But I have seen her. All the cats will be minding their own business eating the food, when Michelle will come along and walk slowly up to the others and start hitting.

On the one hand, it is very funny, but on the other, it is worrying because maybe it means she is insecure.

Mind you, with 6 other cats in your space, perhaps that is the only way to survive.

Wedding bells

2010-07-15T23:48:00.002+02:00

Well, I have been married for just under 4 months, and my life has been turned upside down, inside out, and perhaps, most of all, the right way round.

I had my dream wedding on the 27th of March at a place called Avianto in Muldersdrift, and it was an absolute fairytale. Everything went according to plan, I had the most beautiful dress in the history of the world, the weather played along fantastically, and everyone I wanted to be there, was there. It was a garden wedding, and the décor was fabulous. It was even better than I imagined, and the rain came pelting down about 15 minutes after we all came inside. Good luck indeed.

It is a challenge to have a complete family already, specially one with teenagers where I have not had children of my own yet, but I think that everything is going well, and it will all be fine in the end.

Best of all, my husband is a biker too.

Here’s to many happy years together my love.

Wedding bells

2010-07-15T23:48:00.000+02:00

New year and gadgets

2010-01-01T13:33:00.002+02:00

Happy new year to one and all. And here's my question: if it is 2010, which it is, where are the cool sci fi gadgets like flying cars, teleportatiom devices, and fat eating tablets? Huh? Huh?

I mean, if Ray or Isaac or Arthur had anything to say about it, we would all live in houses that were fully automated with internet everything, wireless everything, and I suppose evil aliens around every corner.

Maybe I can wait if it means we don't get the aliens...

Here's to you. May this year bring you what you want and lots of happiness, joy, and prosperity. :)

Aircon wars revisited

2009-12-10T13:11:00.001+02:00

So what is up with people and aircon? Serious question?

I mean, just because it is 35 degrees outside doesn’t mean that it has to be fucking 15 inside! If you just leave the aircon on 22 degrees all year round there won’t be a problem. When I was living in Canada, I left mine on 22 degrees C and it was very pleasant. When it was cold out I found it pleasant and warm inside, and when it was warm out I found it pleasant and cool inside. 22 degrees is the universally accepted standard “room temperature” and this ridiculous thing of putting the temp down to fucking cold in summer and up to fucking hot in winter is why we all get sick. Yes, I know temperature in and of itself can’t make you ill, but if you are fighting a little infection or a bacteria or a virus, it will.

People wear extra clothes in winter cos it’s cold. They wear layers so they can take them off inside the building, but they certainly don’t expect the fucking heat wave they had last year in Hawaii, and the same goes for summer. People wear light clothing, often with no jerseys etc, so when they walk inside the building and it is as if the North Pole has arrived, it is very, very annoying.

Think people! WTF!

You can ring my bell

2009-12-10T13:09:00.000+02:00

My fiancé is a wonderful man. Despite the fact that we had only actually been dating for a little over two months, maybe slightly longer, he asked me to marry him, and I said yes!

On what I thought was an unrelated topic, he asked me possibly even two or three weeks earlier what I thought about the whole engagement ring thing – should a man get a woman a promise ring, or THE ring, and my reply – thinking it was just a hypothetical question, and therefore I could say anything without considering whether or not it could possibly apply to me – was that I thought a promise ring was best. It was the best since even if the man knew her taste extremely well, and even if she had said that she had liked a few rings they had passed in shop windows, and even if he knew her preference for white versus yellow gold, or heaven forbid - platinum, there was always room that since little girls know what they want even if they don’t, they will know what they don’t when they see it. But they will never say since it is from their beloved, and it is a gift from him symbolizing a whole institution – a romantic gesture that is almost certain never to be topped. It is also the crowning event of a lifelong fantasy that started when we heard our first, once upon a time story. It is something that is just too important to be left to chance unless you know what you are doing.

Now, in my case – he knew what he was doing, and I felt incredibly bad for being told that I could still have a ring made. But since he insisted, I have had the ring designed that will be the most beautiful ring in the history of the world.

Watch this space for pics of both.
In case you don’t get it – my fiancé is the BEST man in the world. And he’s MINE. So there!

What’s inside YOUR toothpaste tube?

2009-12-10T13:08:00.001+02:00

My fiancé and I drive or ride in to work together on a daily basis. Yes, it is sappy, and I don’t care. It allows us to spend quality time cursing together at the traffic. No seriously, it allows us to spend at least an additional hour to two hours a day together just chatting and being in each other’s company. What we talk about is not earth-shattering and it won’t change the face of the earth, but it is special to me, and I really enjoy it.

We work very close together in Sandton and it occurred to me one day that instead of fighting the traffic separately, we should fight it together and lend each other moral support while we were at it. Some days we go in the car and some days we go on our bikes. To that end, he bought us the most fun things – Bluetooth headsets – that are an absolute boon.

The box says the range is 500 metres, but it is really more like 100, and doesn’t seem to work that well round a corner. Dunno why. It is as clear as if he were sitting next to me, and we have the best conversations. I am still loving it more than I guess the average person as it is still a novelty to me, and I just love being able to chat to him while we are riding. He usually rides ahead and gives me warnings about cretins who are blocking the road, hogging the white line, or just about to pull out in front of the cars and bikes – i.e., me; and that is also extremely helpful.

Now, here is an interesting thing. In my previous life, when I was still a faithful church-going member, Craig used to often talk about what was in your toothpaste tube. The analogy went like this: you will only know what kind of character you have if it is tested with pressure. In other words, what is inside a toothpaste tube? Whatever is inside, and you can only know that if you squeeze it.

I have seen him squeezed in traffic and at home, and I am pleased to say that he loves me all the same. No wait, that is another story for another day. I am pleased to say that his principles and beliefs and what makes him who he his remains the same even when under pressure. We are in the car today, and of course, were facing cretins at every turn, but then he noticed an elderly lady on the side of the road, hovering by her car, looking a bit frazzled. He immediately said “we need to stop and help her”. He pulled over and instead of being all bent out of shape by the annoying traffic etc, he was all charming and we helped the lady to get petrol and be on her way. He also didn’t let her pay for the petrol we bought her. (Ok, it was only a small amount, but still.)

I am pleased to say – Craig – I have found a man of solid character, not to mention who is kind to old ladies. My mother would be pleased!

someone else's waxing experience!

2009-08-14T20:44:00.004+02:00

I don't have a clue as to who wrote this, but....WHAT A HOOT

All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The Epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the wax. Read on.........

My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, and play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: 'Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.'

So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off. No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. ('Cold wax,' yeah...right!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!

OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me!

I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.

Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it was a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!
Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. CRAP!

Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is spinning and spotted.
I think I may pass out...must stay conscious...must stay conscious. Do I hear crashing drums??? Breathe, breathe...OK, back to normal.

I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!
There's no hair on it.

Where is the hair???

WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip...it's not! I touch.

I am touching wax. I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake...remember my foot is still propped upon the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.
Sealed shut! My butt is sealed shut. Sealed shut!

I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself 'Please don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off!' What can I do to melt the wax?

Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand, into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???

*WRONG!!!!!!!*

I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit.

Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub....in scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.

So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!

I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter.

'So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!'

There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me.

She wants to know exactly where the wax is located,’ Are we talking cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?'

She's laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.

YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.
While we go through various solutions. I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I’m going to need post-Traumatic Stress counselling for this event.

My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax.

What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend. It's sooo painful, but I really don't care. 'IT WORKS!!

It works !!' I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair....THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF IT! So I recklessly shave it off.

Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.

Next week I'm going to try hair colour... ¶

Sheep or people?

2009-07-18T16:17:00.002+02:00

It always happens. Everytime I park, or am at a sale, or in fact anywhere, I try to stay away from the crowd. Without fail, they follow. It is as if they can't bear to be on their own, or perhaps that they can't bear to see someone not being engulfed by the madd(en)ing crowd.

If I find a few empty parking spaces even if they are far away from the shops, I park there simply because even having cars next to mine kinda makes me feel a bit claustrophobic. There can be rows and rows of empty spots, but five'll get you ten everytime if you bet that all the cars will be grouped around mine when I come out. Why?

Again, at sales - be it the Exclusive sale that is on, or the Edgars sale, or any other kind of sale, I always start away from the others so that I don't have to elbow my way through, or be elbowed. I like to take my time, and think about things. Everytime they see me, they quickly come over and start grabbing stuff around me inc ase I will get something better than they have over there. So I move to where they were, and the chase begins. They simply can't let me stay on my own, and it makes me crazy.

It is for this very reason that I don't do sales anymore.

People with that "group" mentality really suck. LEAVE ME ALONE already...

food versus cell phones

2009-07-10T19:29:00.002+02:00

I was stopped by a very paraat traffic officer the other day for holding my cell phone and my steering wheel in the same hand - I was speaking on speaker, as I had left my walk and talk at home. He motioned for me wind down my window and shouted at me that he wanted to fine me so I should pull over.

I asked politely why? I said I was using the speaker and was not holding the phone to my ear. He was adamant that "one person may not hold their cell phone whilst driving their vehicle".

We waited at the robot to turn, and he didn't want to wait, so just shook his finger at me and drive off.

But here's the question - I have never been stopped by a cop for eating food, or drinking a can of Coke, etc. And yes, they have seen me do it often. I have even gone through road blocks eating while driving.

go figure...

Taxis and no brains take away commuter's rights to choose

2009-06-05T12:15:00.001+02:00

The fucking taxis have really done it this time...

http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=13&art_id=vn20090605061132380C414547

I seriously can't even believe it...

Rules to live by, not only blog by...

2009-05-21T11:49:00.000+02:00

Food Blogger Code of Ethics: Food Blogger Code of Ethics

Marmite or Bovril?

2009-05-14T18:48:00.003+02:00

This evening as I was riding home, I decided to stop in at the shops to get one or two things for dinner.

The Woolies near me makes the best crispy roles, and I suddenly felt like roles with cheese and Bovril. Roles - check. Cheese - check. Bovril? Nope. Only about 10 million disgusting bottles of Marmite...

As they say in Malaysia: "how can?" I was devastated. How can the manager allow such a travesty? :(

Frustration

2009-05-14T12:40:00.001+02:00

I found this somewhere, can't remember where, but thought it was amusing...

Movie Review – Star Trek (2009)

2009-05-14T12:28:00.001+02:00

I went to see Star Trek last night, and I have to say it was an ABSOLUTELY AMAZING movie. It lived up to all expectations, and was lots and lots of fun.

As you may expect, it was action-packed, had lots of special effects, had the usual suspects in terms of the names you know (although much younger so it was not the original cast), but it also had links back to original series which only aficionados would catch. You see a lot of things revisited such as the Kobiyashi Maru test (spelling), one or two of Spock’s famous lines referring back to when he lost his memory which is ironically used, and a few other little things that will amuse you. It also has a very clever twist making it not the usual prequel.

The casting is particularly good, with Bones being particularly well cast in my opinion. He must have studied the mannerisms and speech affectations and intonations a lot in order to match it so well, and Spock is also very well cast in terms of looks. Jim is perhaps the least well cast in my opinion, but you can see why based on the “new” turn of events that occurs. If you watch the movie you will understand what I mean.

Having said all that, for those who are not Trekkies, this movie will also engross and thrill, having a particularly bad guy, lots of fights, and some spectacular special effects. Not like in the original TV series where you can see the fishing line holding up the monsters, this movie is great, and I highly recommend it to everyone.

Oh, and I forgot the most important thing - a cameo by the original Spock himself. WOOHOO!

ha ha ha

2009-05-10T16:28:00.000+02:00

Africa is not for sissies

2009-05-06T19:34:00.001+02:00

http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?from=rss_News&set_id=1&click_id=79&art_id=nw20090506111733528C217165

slowly the wheel is turning...

another milestone

2009-05-05T22:37:00.001+02:00

I have now done 9058 kilometres on my bike since December last year.

WOOHOO!!!

and again more

2009-05-05T22:26:00.002+02:00

yet more canopy tour

2009-05-05T22:22:00.001+02:00

more canopy tour

2009-05-05T22:19:00.001+02:00

Canopy Tour

2009-05-05T21:05:00.005+02:00

I have just recently got back from an 8 day bike trip down to the Tsitsikamma forest. All in all, we rode about 4 113 kilometres all in.

It was freezing in the moutnain passes, and even with a spencer, a long sleeve t-shirt, a fleece, by jacket inner, the jacket and a rain suit; I was cold. At one stage I was so cold that I could not apply the brakes to stop with the rest of the group. My hands just didn't work they were so cold.

I will write a longer spiel later, but here are some of the photos:

Bumper stickers

2009-04-17T20:26:00.002+02:00

Today I saw a bumper sticker that read: "Real men follow Jesus". I began to mull this over in my mind.

Where are the bumper stickers that read: "Real men don't abuse women"?????

They can dish it out, but they can't take it

2009-04-01T18:50:00.002+02:00

Stupid telehone sales people...

I always try to be polite to them - after all, they are only doing their job. But today I got a call from YET another cell phone person wanting to sell me another contract for whatever freephone is the latest thing. He asked me if I was the contract holder. I said "It depends. Why are you asking?" The response was about 10 seconds of silence, then he hung up.

Fucker.

Milestone

2009-04-01T16:23:00.001+02:00

I got my bike on the 20th of December 2008. offially read something like 12 kms. Today, on the way to a client meeting I clicked over 4000. Not bad for 3 months and 10 days!!!

WOOHOO

another weekend ride with small furry animals

2009-03-15T19:27:00.004+02:00

Today I went for a ride out to Harties with a friend.

We started at Linex Yamaha as the meeting place. There were originally going to be 5 of us on the ride, but one bailed due the weather channel saying it was going to rain today and the other two said they had gone on a long ride the day before, so weren't going to make it.

So just the two of us set off along the R512. We went over the dam, and round to the tunnel, where we stopped at Catalinos for breakfast. While we were riding over the dam wall, a brown heron type of bird almost flew into me. I am glad I didn't hit it.

I had the Bambino breakfast which is one fried egg, two rashers of bacon, a piece of toast, and a grilled tomato. My friend had a pizza. The food was great. While we were sitting minding our own business, as one does, I saw either a large mouse or a small rat tun across the floor towards the kitchen!!! OMG!!! Then I looked outside and noticed that there were at least 20 chickens running around in the parking lot. I felt like I was in the twilight zone. We could also hear the monkeys from across the road screaming. Quite an experience I have to say.

It is a very popular place with bikers and there must have been 25 bikes in the parking lot. They were very beautiful, but I still preferr mine. :)

It is also interesting to note that we saw many many bikers on the run, but hardly any waved or nodded back.

After that we went back the long way to Linex and looked at the new 2009 R1. Very nice, but it costs about 189k.

'Crime does pay'

2009-03-10T17:22:00.003+02:00

'Crime does pay'
http://www.news24.com/News24/MyNews24/Your_story/0,,2-2127-2128_2482960,00.html
10/03/2009 14:07 - (SA)

Adrian C, News24 User

I am writing this letter to all South Africans, especially those who feel they work really hard and do not achieve the financial goals they set for themselves.

Fellow citizens, take heart! I have found the answer for your worries. And the best of all: it is easy and it works! It can be summarised in one easy phrase: "Crime does pay".

Let me explain this statement at the hand of a little example. My wife was the victim of a smash-and-grab a few weeks ago. A pretend-beggar walked between the cars at the off ramp, asking for money and when the light turned green he smashed the window, put half his body into the car and grabbed the handbag.

After this, my traumatised pregnant wife did everything right: she drove off, we immediately cancelled all bank cards, opened a case at the SAPS, had the window fixed and got a temporary driver's licence.

It is funny how I always felt sorry for the beggars at intersections and even sometimes gave them money or food. My initial reaction, after the relief that my wife was OK, was that I felt sorry for this poor guy that he had to steal to make a living, and I hoped that he would be able to buy some food or whatever else he desperately needed with the cash that was in my wife's handbag.

Smart crooks

But these guys are much smarter than us. We always thought we had to work to make a living. He already knew the secret that I am about to share, namely that crime does pay.

In the days following the incident, we have received dozens of phone calls from the banks regarding the thousands of rands that have been spent on all the credit cards at dozens of stores all over the city.

These guys know what everybody should know, namely that the banks do not take the small effort to "hot list" a credit card when you take the effort of phoning them to cancel your cards.

Consequently, whoever has the card in his or her possession, can continue indefinitely to make purchases using the card, as long as the purchases remain a few hundred rands each, because nobody ever checks the signatures on the back of the cards, and the shops only check whether the card is stolen if the sale is higher than some floor limit.

Therefore, I encourage people to use this knowledge to their own gain. The banks, which were supposed to "hot list" the stolen cards, do not lose a cent through this, as they would simply not pay the shops for any purchases made with the stolen cards.

'Crime pays'

The consumer loses because shops increase stock prices to make up for these losses. The criminals (which seem to be including the banks) win again, and crime definitely does pay.

Everybody should supposed to know how easy it is to make crime also work for them. Maybe if everybody knew that the banks are the best assistants that violent criminals could ever find, there will be enough collective pressure on them to clean up their act and take the small effort of "hot listing" cards that are reported as stolen.

But for now, crime still pays.

-=-=-=

I sometimes feel incredibly bad for people who are obviously worse off than me, but when you hear about this sort of thing, then what do you do.

I feel sick and bad that people who genuienly want a sandwich because they are starving will now have to pay the price for those fuckers who abuse the situation.

I don't know how to proceed. Some days I still give, and some days I don't. I just hope I have the discernment to get it right most of the time...

Breakthrough in HIV protection

2009-03-10T17:14:00.001+02:00

Breakthrough in HIV protection

http://www.news24.com/News24/South_Africa/Aids_Focus/0,,2-7-659_2466833,00.html

09/02/2009 16:19 - (SA)

Chatsworth - A world-wide study has found that a new vaginal product, the Pro2000, has a 30% effect on HIV in women, the Medical Research Council (MRC) said in Durban on Monday.

"For the first time since the epidemic we are seeing something that would provide an option for women to prevent infection," principal investigator Professor Gita Ramjee told journalists at the council's branch in Chatsworth.

The results of the study were also presented at an international meeting in Montreal, Canada on Monday.

The study, involving 3 099 women, was conducted between February 2005 and September 2008 in Malawi, South Africa, Zambia, Zimbabwe and the United States.

Ramjee said two products were tested - the Pro2000 and BufferGel.

Number of infections

During the course of the study, 194 infections occurred - 36 infections among women using Pro2000 gel, 54 infections occurred among women using the BufferGel, 51 infections occurred among participants who used the placebo gel, while 53 infections occurred among participants who used no gel.

Pro2000 was found to have a 30% effect against HIV, she said.

"... however additional evidence is needed to conclusively determine whether Pro2000 is an effective microbicide... This product has to be proven by another trial," she said.

Microbicides are substances designed to prevent or reduce the sexual transmission of HIV or other sexually transmitted infections.

"Once approved, it would be taken forward..."

A glimmer of hope

Ramjee said the outcome of the study showed there was hope.

"After working for over a decade in microbicide research, we are seeing a glimmer of hope of finding a safe and effective microbicide which could protect women and substantially reduce new HIV infections here in South Africa and globally."

Although no microbicides are approved or available for use, an effective product could provide women with an HIV prevention method which they can initiate, she said.

"This would be particularly helpful in situations where it is difficult or impossible for women to negotiate condom use with their male partners..."

Women account for half of the 33 million people living with HIV/Aids world-wide.

In sub-Saharan Africa, women account for 60% of all infected adults.

In several southern African countries, young women between the age of 15 and 24 are at least three times more likely than their male peers to be infected with HIV.

- SAPA

It's about damn time...

2009-03-10T10:18:00.000+02:00

http://www.news24.com/News24/South_Africa/News/0,,2-7-1442_2482399,00.html

No more fine option for some

Johannesburg - Motorists caught committing certain traffic offences in Johannesburg would be arrested on the spot rather than fined, the city's metro police said on Monday.

"This occurrence of antisocial driving behaviour has resulted in a number of accidents with a number of lives being lost," said Chief Superintendent Wayne Minnaar.

"Fines are not deterring motorists from bad behaviour on the roads, they are still insulting the law by being reckless.

"The plan has already been put into action. Just today (Monday), we arrested seven taxi drivers for offences in Hall Street, in the CBD."

Arrests would occur if motorists were caught skipping red traffic lights, driving facing oncoming traffic, passing on the shoulder lanes, using emergency lanes and disregarding pedestrians.

If caught committing these offences, the motorist would be arrested, taken to jail and would then have to appear in court.

He said that 120 metro police officers were deployed for this operation at 40 hot spots.

"Beware, if you don't adhere to the rules of the road, you will be in handcuffs," Minnaar said.

-SAPA
__________________

Oops - I better watch out...

Today I had my pins out...

2009-03-06T16:59:00.002+02:00

I went back to the Flora clinic, which from now on will be known as the Flora or perhaps the Mayo Clinic. I am not sure why, but my Dad called it that and it stuck.

THe procedure to remove the pins was much quicker than putting them in, and I felt so much better after the anaesthetic. My hand is also feeling way better than with the pins in it. I think it was definitely time for them to come out.

I have the pins - they are exactly like sewing pins with no heads - just a bit longer. They are the same thickness, and have a sharp end. To date, they cost just under 10K each. After the removal I am sure they will almost double in price, so I am going to keep them as a reminder. Perhaps I will fashion some jewelery out of them.

If and when I do, I will post a pic here.

Now all I have to do is work my finger so the stiffness goes away. :)

Zoo Biscuits

2009-03-04T20:38:00.002+02:00

I remember Zoo biscuits from when i was little. They were the coolest.

I bought a packet the other day, and I have to say I am sad. The colours are not the same, and the animals are not nearly the same.

Of the 12 in the pack, I got 7 squiggly squirrels, 1 dolphin, 1 bear, 2 flying things, and 1 indescribable thing.

What do you suppose it is meant to be?

Rain

2009-03-04T20:35:00.003+02:00

I have several things to say about the rain.

I sleep very well when it rains. So well that I often sleep right through my alarm.
People drive like idiots when it rains.
It takes a lot longer to get home when it rains.
There are often beautiful rainbows after the rain. I love rainbows.
The ground smells great after the rain.
The sky somehow looks prettier after it has rained.

Peace.

Idiots who can't speak English

2009-03-04T18:31:00.006+02:00

Go here: http://www.techradar.com/news/internet/7-cool-projects-from-yahoo-rese (sorry I can't seem to get it to insert as a link), and see if you can spot the dumb mistake.

The proof is not in the fucking pudding. It never has been, and it never will be. The proof of the pudding is in the eating thereof, which may be archaic, but that is the actual saying. Oh, and here's another one: for crying out loud in a bucket. WTF?

I refuse to have my language systematically changed just because some fuckwits can't use apostrophes. They place them at random on words like DVDs and PCs, and can't spell. They can't pronounce words properly, and can't even use idioms. Idiots more like.

And what's up with JC Engelbrecht? "Welcome to de wedder". For Fuck's Sake.

Let's have First language news readers, and reporters, and weathermen.

Bring back Graham Hart, and fuck off all you ignorant people who can't use no English proper. Sic. You make me SICK.

Damn gadgets...

2009-03-03T17:37:00.002+02:00

Well, I tried to add a visitor thingy to show where people are from who visit my blog. And surprise surprise, it is isn't working. how unusual... Not

Stolen from a blog I watch...

2009-03-02T15:44:00.001+02:00

http://www.instructables.com/id/Moss-Graffiti/

Posting comments

2009-02-26T18:43:00.001+02:00

So I have been trying to post comments on other blogs, and it has not been working. What's up with that? It looks like it is not working. AGAIN...

Expensive metal

2009-02-24T19:46:00.002+02:00

I finally received my medical aid claim just for information for my operation. It is frightening how much a relatively minor operation costs. It was almost 15k to repair my finger with pins.

My Dad made a joke and said that if I didn't have medical aid I would have had to live with a crooked finger for the rest of my life, but it was a true statement. I don't know who can afford that for something that is not life-threatening. I mean, if a person is gonig to die, you sell your house, you sell your car, - you make a plan. But for a finger?

Thank goodness for medical aids.

I think I will keep the two pins and create some jewelery out of them. :D

Bikers and chatting

2009-02-24T19:32:00.002+02:00

Over the weekend, I was just about to get onto my bike in a parking lot when a pair pulled up on another bike just next to me. It was a couple that seemed very friendly, so we started chatting. She commented on how lovely she thought my pink butterfly helmet was, and I chatted to her about the patterns on the new Shark helmets, and the 20% off at Skinny's. Her male companion said he knew where her shop was and that they may take a turn past there.

We chatted about lots of things, and when i was about to leave, I asked him if he was going to take her to the shop. He said he would if she would agree to another date. HA HA

I did not realise that I was interrupting a serious spading session!! I hope it all works out for them :)

The thing that I like is that bikers usually will chat to each other, and it is fun to be able to chat to them. I that we have a sort of community and are automatically pre-accepted by other bikers.

Cool like that.

First “real” ride after finger op

2009-02-18T10:24:00.001+02:00

This morning I rode in to work on my bike after 12 days of not riding. I did ride my bike home last night from where it had fallen and had stayed, but it was dark and raining, and there was hardly any traffic so there wasn’t much clutching to be done, and I was tense concentrating hard on the dark, wet road etc.

I got home without incident, and even managed to turn my bike around in the car port without dropping her, ha ha, and then realized my finger and whole hand was sore. More sore than I would have expected in fact. But I took a pain killer, watched the end of The Apprentice, had a lovely hot bath, and went to sleep.

This morning, I weighed the pros and cons of riding versus driving, and took my bike to work. Since it was rush hour, and my hand was already sore to start, on the face of it, it may have seemed like the wrong decision, but it was definitely not. Despite the pain of clutching and clutching and clutching through the traffic on to the highway, then clutching some more while splitting, then clutching and clutching even more off the highway to the office, it only took me 20 minutes from door to door. Not like the just less than two hours of Monday in my car… Yes, my hand is swollen again, it is hot and bruised again, but I think it is ok. It is not what might be called “bad” pain, at least I don’t think so. Time will tell…

As I have said before, I love my car, and would never sell it. But getting to work has a number of things I enjoy now that I have my bike again. Here are, although it is difficult to explain the feeling of riding. Perhaps you can ask a dog why it sticks its head out of a window in a car – same thing really.

> The feel of the wind on my neck is exhilarating
> The feel of the wind that creeps into my helmet on my cheeks is cool
> The pressure of the wind and speed (yes I know Mom) on my body is very freeing
> The feeling of the response of power and thrust as you open the throttle is not easy to explain, but gives me a feeling of freedom and perhaps even power
> The surge of adrenalin when I get off the bike, even still, makes my hands shake a little, and gives a little “high” every time
> The joy of knowing that I am saving time and petrol also makes me happy

In general, I know there are risks, and I may even break my finger and need pins (D’oh) but this is a risk I have accepted, and am applying the safety I know how to, being cautious, and being as courteous as I can on the road. Surely this can only stand me in good stead?

I love my bike. I love riding my bike. I love my bike.

PS - my bike is so full of bird poo that it must weigh an extra 2 kgs! I will wash her this afternoon when I get home.

First ride after breaking my finger

2009-02-17T20:37:00.002+02:00

Today is the 17th of February. I broke my finger on the 5th and it was operated on on the 6th and 2 pins were put in it. I got to ride my bike home today after not riding or driving at all, and it was surprisingly sore to grip the clutch.

The 40kms home was more difficult than I thought it would be because my hand has healed a lot and has not been that sore at all lately. It is also very weak compared to the other one.

I guess it requires a lot of work and time before it will be back to normal. But I am sure it will be as good as new soon. soon...

Fitness versus fatness

2009-02-16T21:38:00.002+02:00

Today the lifts were out of order at work.

Now in the past, I have walked up 13 floors during a power outage with no problem, but based on today's four flights up stairs, it was a lifetime ago. My legs were burning, my chest was on fire, and I was slightly out of breath. My my. Someone is totally unfit.

In the past 5 years I have lost 40 kilograms which I believe is a tremendous achievement. I have had a slight slip up - in the last 6 months I have put back about 6 kgs, but on the whole, I have kept my weight down, and was relatively fit. For some reason, I stopped going to gym, and have become fat and not fit again.

It is time for swift and decisive action so watch this space...

Now my Gadgets have disappeared

2009-02-15T15:12:00.003+02:00

I have been fiddling with the settings to get Google Analytics to work, and now I cannot add any more gadgets as they have all disappeared.

That sucks.

:(

Gadgets - a mixed blessing

2009-02-14T19:53:00.003+02:00

I added the counter to my blog from the gadets available on the blog template - but it doesn't seem to work.

According to this counter, more than 2 million people have visited my blog in the last 5 years...

Hmmmm...
I am off to Google analysitcs to see what's actually potting.

Oh dear, I added the tracking data, and the text went all squiffy and large. Hope it is fixed now.

Cabin Fever

2009-02-14T19:36:00.003+02:00

I used to want to be on my own all the time, away from others, not talking to anyone, and it suited me just fine. That seems like a lifetime away, and I have grown up a lot since then. I have learned that I love people, need people, and really enjoy being around them. I knew this, but really only realized this in the past two weeks.

Last week I was house sitting and working out of an office where no one else was anymore (since we have all moved), and then since I broke my finger I have been unable to ride or drive so I have been working from home this week. I have found that it has been very difficult not speaking to anyone, and not having any chitchat at all.

Quite apart from the feeling that all I have dine in the past week was work since I have been in the same space for6 24 hour periods, (and my house is incredibly small), I have not spoken to another human being apart from briefly here and there on the phone, and I realize that I am sad about that.

I guess I am finally growing up. Rock on!

Caution: Politically incorrect post ahead...

2009-02-12T10:35:00.002+02:00

I was reading on a forum I am part of that Mr Zuma (our infamous) president was introduced overseas as "Mr Zuma, and Mrs Zuma, and Mrs Zuma, and Mrs Zuma,..."

Now, last time I checked, bigamy, or indeed polygamy was illegal. Except, and here is where it gets interesting, where it has been a cultural norm for other rules to apply.

Surely this is a slippery slope?

It is usually illegal or immoral to do many things, but if my culture has a history of doing it then it is no longer illegal? WTF?

So if my culture if one of non payment, then it becomes ok not to pay, by law?

If my culture is one of thieving because we have not been taught better, or have no role models who had jobs, it becomes ok by law?

If my culture is to have many wives where the rest of the civilised world only has one, well that's okay too.

If I want to behave illegally by destroying property, intimidating other workers, and even killing or harming other workers during a legal strike (which actions are not legal, even within a legal strike), well, that's ok too.

And if I want to commit crimes of corruption - well that's also ok, because the leaders of my culture showed me that that was the way to do things and it has always been done that way.

How long is the period to decide if it is a cultural norm?
How many people have to do it before it is a "culture"

And what if the president of the ruling party is a criminal, a fool, and a gormless smiling twit who sings machine gun songs from decades ago which have lost their original meaning, inciting the youth to something that was not its original intention? And what if the president decided to bring legal action that went like this: "I have done nothing illegal, but here is an injunction saying you can't prosecute me for anything I may or may not have done", and then he stalls in the courts, causing his millions of savage followers to say that the courts are unfair because he in entitled to a fair and speedy trial?

What if we actually wanted to be a country that was not laughed at by the rest of the world? A country that was actually trying to get out of its third world status? What if the ruling party had no guts and no gumption, and didn't take its leaders to task about illegal doings?

What if the ANC just took its balls in its hand and said: "Jacob Zuma, you are currently involved in a situation where it is yet to be proved that you are innocent. Please step down until the allegations are proved false. Or we will fire your ass."

And what if pigs could fly?

Two pins in my finger...

2009-02-09T11:50:00.003+02:00

I was house sitting in the house with the steep driveway, and on Thursday I arrived with the gate and automatic door opener in my pocket, stopped on the road and opened the gate. The dogs rushed out to say hi, and got between my feet figuratively speaking) and I bailed off my bike. But, I bailed in such a way that I pinned my pinkie between the log edging of the driveway and my throttle. For a moment, I could not move or lift the bike off my finger.

It started to really hurt, and I began to realise that I had to help myself as there was no one else around. I also realised that due to the position of the bike I could not wriggle out from the bike and lift it off my finger, not kick it off me. I was well and truly stuck. The only thing I could do was rip my hand out, leaving my glove behind. It really hurt, but at least I was free.

I then realised that I would be unable to move the bike or lift it due to its position, so I hit the kill switch, and used the garage opener to let myself into the house. I sat down and tried to calm down, but it was so sore that I just cried and cried. I called my Dad to see if I should go to the doctor, but then realised that I would not be able to pick my bike up, never mind riding.

He said he would come fetch me and take me to the doc.

Long story short, he arrived and we went to the Flora clinic where it took the whole day to be seen, have the x-rays, and find out that the finger was completely broken and would need to be pinned under general the next day.

The next day we went back to the hospital, very thirsty, and eventually, they saw me at 12pm. The op lasted 55 minutes, and it was over. My hand is very sore, but is improving every day.

PS - I just noticed the bricks!!!

Here are some pics:

Strange noises in other people’s houses

2009-02-04T08:56:00.001+02:00

I am house sitting for someone, and yesterday I could swear there was someone else in the house with me. Cue twilight zone music...

Even the cat looked at the door expectantly a few times as if there was someone about to walk in with some of the noises. Perhaps there are ghosts living there. He did say the ceiling beams creak and expand, but beams don’t sound like footsteps.

After feeding the three large Alsatians (which I have to say did make me feel better until they started barking at midnight and would not stop) I adjourned to the TV room to watch whatever was on DSTV. I only have free TV so it was a real treat for me. As it turns out, there wasn’t much, and I ended up watching the Apprentice anyway.

Now, there are three very large dogs, and three very small cats (and three gold fish, although I don’t think the gold fish would have done much if there was a burglar) that live there, and the dogs live outside, and the cats generally live wherever they please. Somehow, the female Alsatian – my favourite as it happens - got in the house and came and slept in my room. I must say it made me feel a lot safer, but I still wonder how she got in. I woke up with three cats sleeping on top of me, a dog at my feet, and the two dogs outside my window.

If I think of how nervous I was staying in this huge house where there were spooky noises, I realize I was silly to even think anything was amiss. I do realize though that living in a complex definitely makes me feel safer, and I am not sure if I would stay in a free standing house while I am still living on my own.

The only thing that was a problem is that this morning I woke up with a swollen mouth and lips. I didn’t eat or drink anything strange or unusual, and there doesn’t seem to be any evidence of a bite of any kind. I can only assume that I am allergic to the dogs, the fabric softener this family uses, something in their house, or I went sleep walking and bumped into something. My mouth is not sore, but I am talking funny, and it does look like I have been in a fight.

Just what I always needed – to be a biker chick with a fat lip. Nice.

Street vendors

2009-01-31T15:57:00.005+02:00

So yesterday I was in my car again as I had to deliver documents to a client. (I won't go into how sad I was and how much longer it took not being on the bike - that is a story for another time.) I noticed something very funny in front of me.

It would appear that the vendors who sell car cell phone chargers, super glue, caps, and fruit know which the soft targets is, or they just get a kick out of hassling people.

Yesterday, we were all stuck in a long queue of cars waiting for what seemed like an age, creeping slowly down the road towards the traffic light, giving ample time to the sellers to annoy all and sundry when I noticed that the lady in front of me was being harassed by every single seller, and yet I was not being approached by even one.

This is my theory:

I always look grumpy, and or busy, and or frightening, and if one of them makes the mistake of asking me how much his wares cost I either flatly ignore them, or if in a foul mood, I shout that I don't fucking care, and to fuck off and leave me alone.

I used to be all sweet and greet these people, and then I realised that no matter how polite you are, they don't care about anything other than you buying something, and if you are talking, you are a potential customer until you ignore them or be rude. This is unfortunate, but seems to be a fact.

I no longer greet these people, and ignore them as if they don't exist. This makes them ignore me back, which suits me just fine. This brings me back to the lady in front of me. For starters, she had her window open. Rookie mistake number one. If your window is open, you are fair game, and no matter what you say, these guys are going to talk to you and sell you whatever they have, and try to barter with you about the price. Secondly, she was being all sweet and greeting every person, then saying kindly and politely, no thank you, I don't need any pumice stone, any peaches, any cheap sun glasses, a handmade cloth, etc.

Of course, this just eggs them on. If you actually speak to them, this seems to indicate the beginning of a negotiation. I could see her getting more and more angry and shaking her head vigorously at each consecutive person, and could hear her getting louder and louder with each respective request. Eventually, she was almost crying. I was crying, but with laughter.

I think these sellers secretly enjoy winding up the car drivers, and probably take a bet on how many people they can upset in an hour, and try to beat their own totals in a day.

How the hell else are you supposed to keep yourself amused if that is all you have to do all day?

My bike was spannered by a (well meaning) spanner

2009-01-31T15:30:00.002+02:00

There is a man at my local hardware store who is very helpful, but is not technically very great. I went to the hardware to get a small shifting spanner so that I could tighten my mirrors where they are loose. I needed to adjust them, by just moving them forward untightens them, and so I needed to be able to tighten them myself.

He said the nuts were a 14 and a 15 after we went outside and measured, but then he swapped them around, and used the big one on the small one and stripped the nut. He then proceeded to strip the smaller one as well. So now, I don't know which is the correct size at all. And I have stripped nuts on my left mirror.

I have said it before, and I will say it again. I really would rather do it myself, but men keep offering to help me. One day, perhaps, a man can actually get something right, and do it better than I can.

Please just LISTEN to me...

2009-01-31T12:56:00.003+02:00

I messed with the settings on my DVD player two weeks ago, and consequently, it stopped working. D'oh!

I phoned Stax where I bought it, and spoke to two people who didn't understand what I was talking about. After insisting to speak to other people, I got through to a third person who knew exactly what I had done, and said I just needed to bring it in and he could reset it for me.

Eventually, this morning, I took it there, and this is what happened:

Me: "Good morning. Please can you help me?"
Salesman number 1: "Certainly. What is the problem with this DVD player?"
"Well, I changed the settings on my menu and now I can hear the movies, but can't see them. I called and the person I spoke to said I should bring it in and he could reset it for me."

Salesman number 1 then plugged it in to the nearest TV and could not find a picture.
"Oh, there is no picture."
"Yes, I told you - I messed up the settings."

He then changed from AV 1 to AV 2. Still no picture.

"This is broken, and needs to go for repair."
"No, it is not broken, I told you, and I messed up the settings. I called and spoke to someone who said that I needed to bring it in to have the settings redone."
"Well, I need your remote please"
"I don't have it here, he didn't mention I should have brought it, but I am sure any of yours will work,"
"No, this is a very old DVD player, and none of my remotes will work. Besides, I can’t get a picture, it must be broken.”
No, you are on AV2, and besides, I told you, it was working perfectly well until I changed the settings.”
“Ok then your cable is broken.”
“Um, not really, because you are using your cable and it is still not working.”
“Well, I can’t get a picture either, it must be broken.”
“Sir, with all due respect, you are not listening to me. I changed the settings and it stopped working. It needs to be reset. It is not broken. And if I had brought my remote it would not make a difference because you cannot see the menu on the screen. Please can you call someone else?”
“Ok, please wait.”

He returns with another person.
Salesman number 2: “Hi. We don’t have any remotes that will work on this DVD player, you should have brought yours then I could fix the menu for you.”
“Umm, please can I explain the story to you?”
“Ok”
“It was working fine, but then I changed some of the settings. When I changed it, the picture went away, and I can no longer access the menu. I phoned and spoke to a gentleman who said he knew what I had done and I just needed to bring it in and he would fix it for me.”
“No, he was just going to do your menu thing, which I can’t do as you have not brought your remote.”
“Well, then, let me show you that it won’t work. Bring one of your remotes please.”
“We don’t have any.”
“What about these display DVD machines?”
“No, you must use yours.”
“Ok, let me ask you this – if the man I spoke to was just going to reset it using my remote, why didn’t he just tell me how to do it over the phone?”
“I don’t know, but go home and phone and I will tell you how to do it over the phone.”
“I tell you what, why don’t you write down the instructions for me now instead please?”
Well, I need to know what is on your remote before I can tell you.”
“Ok, most remotes are the same. Bring me a remote and I will tell you which one it looks like.”
“No, it has to be your one.”
“Sir, with all due respect, I don’t think you understand the problem. I cannot fix it using the remote because I cannot see the menu.”
“No, I understand exactly, and you must just change the setting.”
“Please can you call someone else?”

Salesman number 3 overhears me getting louder and louder as this has now taken about half an hour, or it certainly feels like it. He says: “I know what to do – bring me a component cable please.”
He then plugs it into other coloured holes – green and something, not the white, red and yellow that I have, and changes it back to AV1, and voila. There is a picture. He then explains that I have just hosen progressive scan which does probably not work with my old TV – double checking that I don’t have a green plug hole, and then fetches a remote from just one metre away, resets the menu which we can now see, and it is fixed. (PS - my TV is probably 2 years old, and if that is old then I don't know...)

The other two kind of slink off invisibly, and I thank the third man profusely, wondering why the hell he didn’t come and help earlier. He was probably getting his dose of info for HIS daily blog.

It is as I have said before – don’t assume I am stupid and know nothing. LISTEN to what I am saying and assume that I may know what I am talking about.

Generally, I find that women and men are treated equally, and I have no cause ever to decry being a girl and not a boy, especially not at work. But just sometimes, I come across some Neanderthal man who thinks I must be stupid just because I am female. To you Mr Fuckwit, I say, don’t try help me with what you think I need, open your ears and listen. This will lessen both our frustration levels, and prevent GBH to some small-minded git who has not progressed past a third grade education.

Rant off.

Bird brain? Not really...

2009-01-29T17:54:00.003+02:00

A few days ago, I noticed that there was a Weaver nest starting in a scruffy indigenous bush in my garden.

I need to specify that my garden is a strange mixture of English garden and scruffy indigenous plants. And yes, I planted it like that myself. I started from literally nothing – an empty stand which was built from the ground up, so I can’t even blame anyone. I just sort of changed my mind halfway and am slowly changing the look to indigenous over time.

Anyway, the birds seem to enjoy my garden because I have two scruffy trees for them to build nests in, I have a bird bath, two bird feeders, and two enormous fig trees. I say scruffy, because there really isn’t any other way to describe it. I deliberately let it be scruffy to encourage the scruffy birds to feel at home and come make nests, and they do. And now there is also a pair of Weavers there.

Unfortunately, my cat brought me, as presents you understand, the males of the only three nesting pairs of red-headed quelias. Sad, but true. She likes to sit in the tree above the bird feeders, but has only been successful at catching them when they are on the ground eating the seed that falls out of the feeder.

At the beginning of the week, as I came home, I left my door open to get a breeze inside. A few minutes later I heard a commotion outside – like many birds fighting or yelling. I went to look, and there must have been 10 to 15 little brown jobs sitting on my fence yelling at me that the bird feeder was empty.

Say what you like about birds being stupid. They do know when their food is finished, and they certainly know who feeds them in my garden.

Watch out for me man!

2009-01-27T19:56:00.001+02:00

Today I had to ride to my office in Northcliff to fetch some documents and clear out the last of the stuff since we had moved offices. I had my panniers on, so I thought I would be fine.

On the way, I was in the middle lane minding my own business, as one does, when I noticed in my rear view mirror, a car swerving in and out of all the cars, generally driving like an idiot. The traffic was backed up, and slow, and there were many trucks and busses as well.

Said cretin was approaching me quickly, and suddenly, the traffic in front of me stopped. Since most of us in my lane had sensible following distances, we all managed to stop with little or no effort. But the cretin apparently didn’t see me. At the last moment, he suddenly swerved (thank goodness I had seen him, and moved across to the right of the lane to give myself, and him, as much room as possible), and poured the Coke he was drinking all over his shirt. He must have missed me by 5 centimetres. I guess it’s true what they say – a miss is as good as a mile, but I would rather not have had it happen at all. I have to admit though, I was laughing at him having poured his Coke all over himself.

Just goes to show. Don’t drink and drive.

I cut my hair yesterday

2009-01-26T10:09:00.002+02:00

My hair is longer than it has ever been. Or was, until yesterday. It is now short. Ish. It comes to just below my jaw line, and looks pretty fabulous, even if I say so myself.

The only thing I truly, deeply, honestly, and without hesitation, like about myself is my hair. I got my Mom's hair, and for that I am truly thankful. She has beautiful hair and I got it too.

Until I started riding my bike, it was always healthym never knotted, was shiny, full, thick, and generally beautiful. But riding with it sticking out of the helmet, even in a plait, was causing it distress, and it was becoming damaged, split on the ends, and generally not so shiny anymore. It was time to take action.

Not one to sit around, (after all the ghost of granny Siddle has affected us all, and when it is time to do something, it is time, no waiting, no thinking, and no procrastinating) so off I went to the hair place on Sunday, and had it all chopped off.

The guy tried to stop me, adn asked me if I was sure since it was so long, etc, but my mind was made up. As he hacked away with his razor blade, all I could see was 35 plus centimeters of hair falling into huge piles on the floor. momentarily I wondered if I was doing the right thing, but I knew I was. Anyway, no point is stopping now - I would look like a freak. ha ha

When he had finished, there was enough hair on the floor to stuff a small pillow. I certainly have a lot of it.

I love it now, and it fits nicely under my helmet. No more helmet hair for me, I hope.

Pic to be placed later, once I have one, but i am very pleased with the outcome. :)

I love my car but...

2009-01-23T16:37:00.002+02:00

Today I went to work in my car. I decided to "treat" myself to heels, a skirt, a fancy hairdo, and makeup. These are luxuries I usually don't indulge in when i ride my bike to work, so they are a real treat. I looked good this morning, and my hair was going to stay like all day. Not like with a helmet - the plait starts out beautiful, but by the time the helmet has gone on and off, and the wind has blown all the bits that stick out all over the show, I end up looking like I stuck my finger in an electrical outlet.

I am considering cutting my hair short again, but can't seem to bring myself to do it. It grows out long in just two years, but even still. I think it would be too sad.

Anyway, back to today, and my car. I have been used to commuting on my bike to work which is in Sandton now. Unfortunately, I have to use the Grayston Offramp which from 6:30 until 9am is shock a block with cars. SO much so that the first day I went there I thought there was an accident causing the delay. It is an incredibly busy intersection. It takes half an hour in rush hour to go the 100m from the highway to the top of the offramp.

I have often wondered why they call it "rush hour" when everyone goes so slowly?

On my bike, it takes me a few minutes to wiggle my way through the cars and get to the top and proceed to work, making my total travel time from door to door about half an hour. in a car it has been as long as 2 hours for the same distance.

If I leave at 9am it still takes me half an hour in the car, and of course, that is way too late to be arriving at work, so what is a girl to do?

I had to go in my car today as I was having a very important client meeting, and had to wear a suit etc, and not look like a biker chick. Plus, the rain came down like the Flood as I had to leave, so to admit, for once, I was actually glad to be in my car, or I would have arrived looking like a drowned rat, and the papers that I had to bring would have been destroyed. My boss - who was running the meeting - would not have been pleased, and we probably would have lost the business. This is unfortunate, as I think it should not really matter what I look like, but whether or not I can do the work, but there it is.

I will say this though, Come rain or shine, I still prefer my bike in the mornings and the evenings to my car. I love my car, and I will never sell her, but nothing beats my bike for the traffic.

5 items or less check out queue

2009-01-22T15:39:00.001+02:00

I was buying lunch in the Woolies just across from my office - the usual, a pepper steak pie for my boss and a cornish pastie for me, and I have also bought a few vegies in my basket, and headed to the basket queue. (I often give my boss carrots... but that is another story for anotehr time :)) I was wearing my biker gear, and carrying my helmet.

This particular Woolies has a basket queue and a trolley queue. It seems though, that not everyone sees the bakset queue as most people with only a few items still go to the basket queue. Which is fine. Whatever.

As I was standing in the queue, I noticed, for the first time, a sign that said - "5 items or less", and of course, I read it out loud - a quirk I have. The man in front of me replied "yes, they have a buzzer that will go off if you have more than 5 you know!: and smiled. To which I said: "well, I have seven. I hope they don't throw me out...". He laughed and commented: "Ja, it's those bikers you know - always causing trouble aren't they?"

We both had a good good giggle, and despite getting a bit wet from the rain on the way back, the pies were delicious.

Throttle rocker...

2009-01-18T18:22:00.000+02:00

I have been riding a lot more, and feeling a lot more confident. I commute every day, rain or shine, and there has been a LOT of rain, and I think this is helping me.

I suppose like all things, it is a matter of practice.

I have found one small thing to help me though, and I am glad I found out about it on the forums. It is called a Throttle Rocker, or Throttle Meister. It is essentially a small plastic gadget that makes it easier to hold the juice open – using the palm of your hand and not only your fingers and grip.

It has helped me enormously, and I can’t imagine riding without one. Pic to follow shortly…

Lane Splitting

2009-01-16T19:07:00.003+02:00

I am still gaining confidence on my bike, but I do lane split even on the highway if the traffic is going slowly enough. The general consensus is that you should ride faster than 20 to 30 kms faster than the traffic around you, and I have to agree that this is certainly a good idea. I generally don't even ride as fast as that faster than the cars, as I am still gaining confidence and mastery of my bike at slow speeds.

Yesterday evening on my way home, on the highway, it was like some wonderful dream. The gaps were large, the cars were all friendly and made space, and the bikes behind me didn't seem in a hurry - they all thanked me when I moved out of their way, and it was all good.

This morning on my way into work, it was also good. Slightly less than 100% perfect, as a few cars deliberately cut me off, or tried to stop me from passing, etc. Again, this evening, coming home, it was good, and in general, the gaps were large, although I had to really concentrate.

I have made the following conclusions:

the cars are always the same, but the attitude of the rider determines the ride
As long as you have your wits about you 100%, the cars can do you no harm
if you are tired, or lacking in concentration, you will think it is the cars who are out to get you
if you go too fast, you will eventually come too close to a car, and we all know what the outcome of that is
if you ride like a bat out of hell, you will end up going back there
if you thank the cars, they will be more inclined to move out of the way next time
if you are patient, things are always better for you
even if the car does do something stupid, you are the one who will fall off and have an owie
cars just don't look in their rear view mirrors

I have decided that although it sometimes feels like all cars are out to kill all bikers, and deliberately cut us off, push in front of us, and block our way, it is not the case. They are either just in a hurry, don't care, don't see us, or are thick.

Either way, as a biker, I have to suck it up and wait a few extra seconds. This way I will live to write my daily reports in my blog.

ME, out.

Not everyone hates bikers...

2009-01-12T19:01:00.001+02:00

I saw the magic word today as I was leaving the Chemist on the way back to my bike in the parking lot - SALE - 30% off all items. It was a boutique-type clothing shop in the Carlswald centre that has quite girly clothes, and so I stopped in, helmet in hand, jelly tot bib done up, and laptop back pack on my back.

As I walked in, the lady said sweetly "just let me know if I can help you dearie", and smiled at me. I then took a look at hte clothes.

The other lady behind the counter said "Oh! You are a biker. What kind of bike do you ride?"

10 points for getting "ride" right, and antoher 10 for being so polite I thought. We had a great chat. She had a BM F650 GS which she sold before she emmigrated to NZ, but has had to come back with her husband. SHe says she misses her bike ilke crazy. I bet she does.

I don't know whether her shop assistant know she used to ride or that she just doesn't have a saak with bikers. I was pleasantly surprised by that.

Also, while standing in the queue at Dischem, an elderly lady saw me cleaning my visor. (It was raining and it got dirty).

"What a beautiful helmet" she said. "A lady one - being pink!"

She then proceeded to tell me all about her grand son and his riding and how she worries about him, and how she almost drove through a red robot and that it can happen and taht is why it is so dangerous cos people in cars day dream, etc.

She went on to tell me all about how she and her husband have retired and bought a plaas in the karoo, and how they are leaving tomorrow morning at 5am.

It is lovely when people treat you as a human even when they can clearly see you are a biker. Not everyone does.

:)

Do children think parents don't know?

2009-01-11T13:25:00.003+02:00

It is back to school time, and I saw a few little kids in the shops pulling the oldest tricks in the newest ways. It reminded me of the ways I used to do the same thing. My question is this: do children really think that parents are stupid?

For example, there are two pairs of scirrors - one plain, one pretty and funky. The child says: "but the teacher says we have to get THAT one!"

I can remember saying exactly the same thing. I also remember that my Mom would sometimes let me get away with it, and sometimes not. But I can't remember if I thought she was really that silly as to believe that the teacher had specified a coloured or pretty eraser instead of a plain white one. HA HA

The same thing happened just yesterday in the shop with a small child. She insisted that Mom would always buy THAT cereal for breakfast for her specially for school, and not the plain one. Now consider this: does she really think that the Dad has never paid attention to what she eats? But he did buy it for her.

It was very cute watching the parents weighing up which things to let their children get away with and which not. At the end of the day, I think it was all fairly well done, and the children didn't get away with murder, so I guess it is all good.

I just wonder if I really thought that my parents didn't know I was trying to pull one over on them?

Dropped my bike AGAIN FFS

2009-01-09T08:23:00.000+02:00

I decided to join the biker’s coffee bunch this morning at 6am…

I woke up at 5:30, and decided to snooze for a bit, and eventually got going at just before 6m, knowing that they would still be there if I got there about 6:10 or so.

I didn’t remember that I had to turn left as if to go to Sage Corporate Park, and went straight instead. I then, as soon as it was safe to do so, turned right and wanted to turn around in a drive way, but was on too steep an incline to push the bike backward. I decided there was nothing for it but to do a circle in the bundu. I know that I will not drop the bike if I keep moving, so I try my best to keep going, but the ground is soft from the rain yesterday, and I slip and stall. Then I drop the bike and fall quite badly., trapping myself under it the deepest I have yet. I manage to get out, and although I am little hurt, actually have hurt by back quite a lot, I jump up so that the passing motorists know that there is not an emergency…

One man does stop and help me lift the bike though. I am very greatful as in trying to lift it up myself, on an incline, and a bit shaken, I cannot do it myself.

I then go to the coffee place and find out that although they do serve coffee for the bikers, they don’t start serving breakfast until 7am, which is when I have to leave for work.

Anyway, at 7, I leave, after having met a few more friends, and I make my way to the shopping centre (Benmore Gardens) just over the road from my offices, only to find everything shut (Fair enough at 7:17 in the morning I suppose) except for Fornos. Thank God for Fornos. I order a toasted chicken mayo and wait. The lady who placed the order didn’t do it properly, and it has to be reordered since the manager keeps asking me if I am ok, and eventually he figures out that I am waiting for a take away, and he reorders it. I guess having a biker menacingly standing at the till is not godo for business. Ha ha.

The sarmie was very delicious, and despite the challenging start to the day, I am determined that it will be a good one.

Janis, out.

Nigerian IP addresses?

2009-01-06T11:51:00.001+02:00

We just recently moved into new offices, and as usual there are a few issues with networks, mail access, and the like. The mail is supposed to work through a sat link directly into the cloud, but the ISP’s servers are blocking the IP addresses for some reason.

There has been lost of investigation and it is still not solved, but I suspect a very simple reason for this. The IP range that has been assigned to our network is Nigerian. I can tell this because when you log on to Google it takes you to the Nigerian site.

Perhaps I will set up my own 411 scam. Watch this space…

Pics from the ride

2008-12-28T18:32:00.003+02:00

Ride Report - Clarens

2008-12-27T19:26:00.000+02:00

So I thought it would be good to ride to Clarens with Pieman on the trip he organised for Saturday 27 December, after all, I was only on 300kms and I needed to get to 1000 in order to have run in the bike and get my first service over with.

This morning I woke up at 5:30 all ready to go, and excited about my first trip. I knew that there was giong to be one other person riding in a bike so I knew that at least I would not be the only slow one.

Some of us were going to meet at the Van Buuren off ramp, and then to meet the rest at the Block House Engen. I met the first few at Van Buuren, and they were really friendly and I knew it was going to be a great day. I don't know many people on TB yet, and must admit that I was a bit nervous about the ride. However, all my fears were allayed and I felt right at home, immediately.

We set off towards Vredefort once we had met up with the others, and discussed the route etc.

At one point, I turned a corner too wide on the way to a petrol station, and went bundu bashing, but it was all good, and I managed to get back onto the road with no problems.

After stopping for petrol, regrouping and redistributing the order of riders (which helped a lot) we finally arrived in Golden Gate Park. The scenery was absolutely breathtaking. The sky was blue, the clouds were white, and the mountains were just beautiful. It made me feel very small and insignificant in the large scheme of things.

We rode up and down some twisty turney roads, and I got a few frights, but learned a lot about cornering, braking, and keeping my head up, not looking directly at and into the *&^%$#@ pot holes.

My bike has now done her 1000 "riding in" kilometres, and is going very well. I am happy with how she handled, and how I handled myself on her. I still have a lot to learn (specially after TWO wide turns and treks in the bundu as a result), but have more confidence after today's 800 plus kms.

It was an absolutely fabulous ride, with fabulous people. I believe there are gentlemen out there still, as well as ladies in the true old-fashioned sense.

It was FUN FUN FUN, and I can't wait to do it again... Jsut as soon as I have had my first service.

Ride report - day 3

2008-12-21T09:27:00.000+02:00

So this morning I woke up at 6am and decided to take out my bike.

First thing I do is try turn her round in the car port. Instead of turning her on and using the engine to help me, I tried to push her and managed to drop her again, wedging myself between the wall of the house and the bike. Very eina. I finally manage to get out, and lift my bike using the leverage technique, and take a few minutes weighing up the options of going back to sleep versus sucking it up and going on the ride.

The road won, and I took her out.

A few hundred meters out of the complex (have not stalled yet) and there is a car behind me at the red robot. Nervous, I open the throttle a bit too much, lift the front wheel off the ground and scare the CR@P out of myself, but manage to keep it under control.

I head straight for a parking lot to practise my pull offs, and after about half an hour I decided to teach my bike the way to Sasol Pine Haven to see if there were any bikers there today.

Many bikes passed me on the way since I am riding her in and am keeping it under 4000 revs. I got there about 7:20 only to find that I just missed the group ride, but I did chat to a bunch of fellow bikers who meet there every weekend. I am sure you all knew that, but I didn't.

I stayed a bit, then got back on my bike, and came home the long way round.

My gear shifting is much smoother, and I didn't stall once today. :)

I am getting more confidence, although I still need much more time at low speeds.

I am just loving my bike, and am feeling more and more like part of the family since I am noticing more and more bikers waving and nodding at me.

I am working this week until 12 on Wednesday, but will go on my bike. I plan to complete my first 1000 kms before the end of December. That is the plan. I am sure I can make it. I am looking forward to more saddle time, but my back hurts from the fall t his morning, so I may not go out again this afternoon. I will have to see. I suspect a hardened biker would simply do it, but I don't want to risk being weaker and dropping her again. Sigh.

Anyway, thanks for all the encouragement. :)

Difference between my scooter and my new F 650 GS

2008-12-20T20:24:00.000+02:00

A few interesting things surprise me in the differences between my scooter (which I am sad to say I no longer have), and my new bike.

Apart from the the most obvious thing which is the acceleration, I have found that I feel much steadier (except at slow speeds when I am not yet as confident as I was on my scooter). I find it easier to take corners, and the braking is also better since I can use the gears to change down.

I like the fact that I am almost "holding" the bike with my legs instead of just sitting on the seat as I was on the scooter, and all in all, I feel safer with a bike that is able to give me much more when I open the throttle. I went on the highway, and was pleased to be able to accelerate up the hill instead of having to move over and hope against all odds that the cars would not bump me out of the way because I was only doing 75 up the hill.

Scooters are really lovely, and I am not sorry I started on mine. I loved her, and was sad to have to sell her, but it is time. I am pleased to have upgraded, and find that although I have a lot to learn, and need a lot of practise, I am loving every second of riding. I definately made the right choice.

I am also glad that I bought the most expensive ATGATT I could afford when I was scooting so that I don't have to buy anything new or replace anything now. It is all suitable for faster / harder / longer riding, and the plus side is while the bike is shiny and new I don't like a complete noob (except when i am stalling or dropping the bike ) since my gear has some houding.

Proof

2008-12-20T17:12:00.004+02:00

Here is my new pride and joy - my new baby.

thanks to my Dad, here is a vid of me stalling...Ha ha ha

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3952338594407892826&hl=en

Ride report - Day 2

2008-12-20T16:16:00.000+02:00

Well, I have to keep riding if I am to get better, don't I?

Today I set off to Full Throttle. When I got there, I noticed that everyone was parking backwards, or perhaps the right way round, and I had arrived and wanted to turn my bike around. I rode up onto the pavement and proceeded to nearly put my bike down right at the front door!!

Three gentlemen helped me to catch the bike and turn her round, and I do thank them for that. I guess it was a little to much to try that at that stage...

After I left there i went to see Skinny at her shop. Then I just rode around and went to see my parents in Randburg.

I managed to do several pull offs quite smoothly, and only stalled twice today. :D

I am gaining confidence slowly, and will need a LOT of practise and time in the saddle, but the main thing is that i am having fun.

I rode 150kms today. I plan to do antoher 150 tomorrow.

Thanks to all those who gave me advice about the aprking lot, pulling off practise and straight line driving. I plan to do that tomorrow as well, and a lot this week coming (I finish work on Wednesday).

Yaay.

Catch you all on the flip side.

my new bike!

2008-12-19T19:22:00.000+02:00

WOOHOO

So I picked up my new bike this afternoon - a BMW F650 GS. It is beautiful, and all shiny and new.

Since I am used to riding a scooter, and have only once ridden a bike with gears for about 5 minutes, I knew it was going to be a challenge getting used to the whole thing of pulling off, changing gears, operating the back break with my foot, and so on - not to mention the fact that it is about 1- times as heavy and twice as tall as my scooter was.

After stalling about 7 times , I finally managed to get the pull off going, and then a car drove in front of me out of nowhere (yes I know it was my fault for not looking) and I stalled. I was leaning a bit too much to the right, and was not able to hold the bike up for more than a few seconds as it was just past the point fo balance and my leg was at the wrong angle. Boom. I dropped the bike, but luckily not from too high.

Then I tried the walking backwards trick to pick up the bike, but by this stage my nerves are shot and I am sweating like a mine worker in my full gear, and my strentgh seems to have desrted me, so I can't pick it up. Not no how. Thankfully a helpful security guard who had been watching and laughing at me (good naturedly) came and helped me.

So I have already got a scratch on my bike, and the process has begun. Sigh.

I then decided to just take the bike out on the road and practise more and get comfortable with the feeling of hte bike, and rodea few round trips of Midrand.

I must say - she rides like a dream, and accelerates WAY better than my scoot.

I hope to ride again tomorrow all over the show, and go visit some friends who live as far away as possible. :)

Stay tuned for the next episode, and possibly some gear testing if I fall off... D'oh!

Dating sites

2007-09-14T11:54:00.001+02:00

I don’t know if there are truly no gentlemen left, or if there were never any out there to start with, but I am more and more convinced that no one has any manners or class anymore.

I joined a dating website – yes I know what you are thinking, and I don’t care.

Anyway, I am 36, still attractive, and looking for my prince charming. It is just a pity that there are so many cretins out there.

I have received 186 views in a day and a half, and thought I was doing quite well actually (even if I do say so myself), but that was until I read the mails. Half were from married men, one quarter were from men who are only looking for no strings “fun”, and the other quarter are either so needy they make me want to run for the hills, or so distant and aloof they make the petrol in my car seem like a better bet for a long-term thing.

According to the automatic matching thingy, there are 1000 matches out there for me with a rating of 90% and higher, based on my preferences, but when I write to them I guess they are either turned off by the assertiveness, what I have to say in my profile, or just don’t like my picture. What else is there to say? I did find a few of my friends and colleagues on there which was quite amusing. I guess we all say things about it, but are willing to give it a try anyway. After all – where are we supposed to meet people if we work long hours, and cannot be bothered to go to smoky booze-filled bars to meet people under false pretences? I say false pretences because it is not my natural habitat, and anyone I meet there will assume that I like to hang out there, which I don’t. It is a difficult call. There are not really any sports clubs, and people at gym are there for their “me” and "de-stress” time, so are not really there on the prowl. And anyway, who wants to me picked up hot and bothered, sweating, looking anything but your best with your but hanging out of a leotard or shorts that are hiking up into no man’s land?

I just don’t know what the answer is.

Mixed news in the WWE

2007-07-05T17:35:00.000+02:00

First, we hear that the Rabid Wolverine, that bringer of toothless aggression, Chris Benoit has died, then we hear that Vincent Kennedy McMahon has been killed in a bomb blast that rocked his limo.

The only good thing these past few days has been that the WWE is coming to Johannesburg on the 6th of September. Woohoo!

I mourn for the loss of one of Wrestling's finest and greatest gentlemen - Chris Benoit. He died after killing his son and wife (unfortunately), but will be greatly missed. He is best known for his crippler cross face maneuver, which once applied and locked in is inescapable. He is also known for his triple suplexes, and some high flying off the top rope to l and with his elbow on his opponent before applying either of these moves.

I hope he is inducted into the hall of fame really soon.

Now onto the cretin - Mr McMahon.
It was Mr McMahon appreciation night on Monday night RAW, and they showed him being booed by the crown. Yaay. Cretin.

Then they showed him walking out to his limo. Now they never film anyone going out to their limo unless something is going to happen. in this case, it exploded. Apparently, the FBI are investigating this and charges will be brought as soon as anything can be found.

I think he has just retired, and wants to be left alone. Talk about show business.

Just think - i will get a chance to see John Cena, Batista, Umaga, and the rest in September. I wonder what the soapie plot will be by that stage.

But one thing still remains constant. Edge is still a loser.

The best tag team match in a long time

2007-06-25T12:43:00.000+02:00

Yaaaaay!

Finally, Batista, and Benoit got together and had a match against Edge and MVP. Obviously, there are personal issues between Edge and Batista; and between MVP and Benoit. That always makes for a much better match, and this was no exception.

All I can say is that Benoit and Batista are the best in teh biz as far as I am concerned.

What is more, Batista beat the Rared R Super Star in a steel cage match (which unfortunately wasn't shown here) to reclaim his title, and as usual, Edge has been moaning abuot how unfair it all is since then.

Edge is a loser
Edge is a loser
Edge is a loser
Edge is a loser
Edge is a loser
Edge is a loser...

Working with some men is like watching a pissing contest

2007-06-21T10:47:00.000+02:00

I have just had the “privilege” of hearing two of my colleagues go head to head on who had the better understanding of some obscure and arbitrary naming convention. Funny thing is that they weren’t even comparing the same one. And it wasn’t even relevant to the conversation. They were just having a pissing contest. Fuckwits.

And all this behind me, getting louder and louder until they were shouting at each other. Eventually I said something about the noise level and they were very offended. They had so lost the original point of the conversation they didn’t even know where to begin again, and adjourned the so-called “meeting” to start again tomorrow.

Just goes to show – never argue with an idiot. He will bring you down his level and then beat you with experience.

Return of the World’s Strongest Man

2007-06-21T10:41:00.000+02:00

Last night I watched Marc Henry wrestle Kane, and it was a real treat to see Kane being pushed around somewhat. It was the most interesting thing. Both men stand at 7 feet tall, and in the ring they looked just like normal people battling each other. I have not often seen people push Kane around, or be able to lift him into the air and throw him to the ground with seeming ease.

The self-proclaimed silverback – Marc Henry, who is back from Knee surgery and recovery over a year ago, is on his come back path, and had to go through Kane first. His strategy was very interesting, and he won his bout, although if the match was to be won on points, Kane may have ultimately had the upper hand.

Marc Henry kept getting out of Kane’s way by leaving the ring, but coming back in just before he was counted out. Very clever strategy to get out of the way of the Big Red Machine’s huge ham fists, and choke slam tactics. Especially as you could tell that every now and then his surgically repaired knee was not quite as agile as the other.

After watching them give each other a few beltings back and forth – neither seeming to be the worse for wear, Marc Henry managed to throw Kane out of the ring, and he was counted out and lost the match to Marc Henry.

I had forgotten how agile such a huge man could be – all 400 pounds of Marc Henry are back, and if this first match was anything to go by, his come back trail will be worth watching.

Wrestling update

2007-05-11T11:44:00.000+02:00

Dave Taylor and William Regal took on Kane in a handicap match. At first I couldn’t tell who was the handicapped party – it takes at least two men to have a fair fight against the big red machine. The two kept switching out to be fresh while they kept mauling Kane on the floor – looking as if they had the upper hand…

After what seemed like inhuman punishment, Kane eventually just stood up and took the two to task with a big double clothes line, isolating them one by one, and hurling them to the floor. Flying off the top turnbuckle, Kane threw William clean across the floor, then clothes lines him out of the ring, and choke slammed Dave. They both turned tail and ran, being counted out, handing Kane another victory.

Kane is the brother of the newest Heavyweight Champion – the Undertaker. I believe that between the two of them – Taker and Kane – they would make an unbeatable tag team. I don’t know why they don’t team up and do that. Kane and Taker are both well over 6 foot, and both step easily over the top rope. They are both enormously tough, and almost unstoppable. Proof of this was that The Animal Batista was unable to beat Taker at Wrestlemania 23, losing his title, but who knows what sill happen at backlash.

My money is on Batista. Watch this space.

The Cosmos flowers this year

2007-04-26T09:39:00.000+02:00

This year I have noticed that the Cosmos were in full bloom again over Easter, and are still showing their brave colours in the face of oncoming winter. However, this year I have noticed something else as well. There are usually three distinct colours – white, pale pink and dark pink. This year there appear to be only two – white and light pink. I have only seen three patches of the dark pink, and they were more like one or two flowers standing alone than patches really.

I don’t know why that should be. Perhaps, despite the fact that it is illegal to pick them, people have picked these dark flowers, and there were no seeds left to regenerate that colour this year, or perhaps it is genetically a weaker specie, or perhaps there is a dark pink cosmos flower eater doing the rounds, and they have all been eaten. I don’t know. All I know is that the dark red is my favourite colour, and there are hardly any this year. It is a pity too, because they add such a beautiful splash of colour to the roadsides.

They are still beautiful with the white and light pink, but because I know there is something missing, it seems like a pity.

Internediate Motorcycle training

2007-03-28T15:31:00.000+02:00

I completed my Intermediate Motorcycle training last Saturday at Gerotek, and it was great fun. I learned a lot about handling my scooter, and about handling myself on the scooter, as well as what not to do. Here is a brief synopsis:

Firstly, we discussed rider safety gear, which I already knew from my club and biker friends; although it is amazing to see how few people take it seriously. I know that you can tend to feel like a bit of a plonka wearing full gear if you are only going down to the shops, but there is an acronym that all bikers should live by – ATGATT. It stands for all the gear, all the time, and is worth remembering. I speak from experience.

Once we had discussed the pros and cons of full leathers versus cordura or Kevlar, and the necessity of spending a minimum of R2500 (yikes, mine cost way less than that) on your helmet, we started on the clutch and throttle control at low and high speed. This was interesting because there was a person there whose bike was far too big and heavy and this person kept stalling and dropping the bike. To practise this we did various manoeuvres in straight lines, in wide arcs, and in circles around cones.

After that we went onto continuous circles around cones in a figure of eight. That was very cool. I think it may have to do with the fact that I don’t have a clutch (I ride a scoot) but I have loads of fun on this exercises zooming around the cones.

After that we went to the mountain pass and learned how to enter and exit a corner, how to judge the speed, and how to tell when it is time to accelerate out of a corner. This may sound basic, but if you don’t have a clue, and find yourself bliskeming through the barrier, you will know what I mean when I say you need to learn this!

The mountain pass was fun as we did corners up hill and down hill, on sandy patches, fairly sharp corners, and while chasing each other. Loads of fun again.

After that it was onto the gradient slopes. This proved to be very interesting for those whose clutch control was a bit dodgy. While we were there, we watched the Landrovers go down what looked like a 90 degree slope (Help!) and come up a 45 degree slope. I didn’t see the sign, and I am sure it cannot have been 90 degrees, but it was certainly too damn steep to have walked.

After lunch, we went to the suspension track to ride over simulated surfaces. This was more fun. Potholes, gravel, bad conditions, etc. Swerving, braking, slopes, and you name it. More fun was had by all.

After that we went to the Dynamic Ride and Handling track to put it all together and see if we had actually learned anything. That was groovy. We could go as fast as we wanted, and some zoomed faster than others. There were many sharp corners here but the hills were not as much fun as they were gentler.

The final thing of the day was the High Speed Oval. WOOHOO! Of course, I went as fast as my scoot would let me, which was a pitiful 95KPH (she can go at 105, but only on a down hill with a tail wind), but that was better than nothing. We were divided into relative speed groups, and none of the others overtook me. Ha ha.

All in all, it was a fantastic day, and I learned how to take a line into a corner, and most importantly, how to safely accelerate out of a corner. Also, how to read a corner. I also learned when and how to use back brakes (hardly ever), and when and how to apply brakes in gravel.

I had the best time, and learned a lot to keep me safe.

To all you other 2 wheelers out there: safe riding, and God speed.

Department of Homeland Affairs

2007-03-19T14:38:00.001+02:00

Another bug bear I have at the moment is the Department of Homeland Affairs. My passport has expired. In order to get another, it takes 6 to 8 weeks, unless you apply for a temporary one which you can get in 11 days.

If you apply for a temporary one at the same time, you have to complete 2 application forms, and pay an additional R500 for the “emergency” document, although there are 2 specific blocks on the application form – one saying emergency passport, and one saying emergency travel documents. This one is a temporary passport, and will allow you have a passport much quicker than the usual wait. But there is a catch. There are MANY countries that do not accept these so-called temporary passports such as the UK, Dubai, India, and a few other I forget.

I have also discovered another annoying thing. The reason it takes 6 to 8 weeks for the normal passports to be ready is that they are not processed right away.

There is an SMS number you can text to see the progress of you document, and so far, mine is still not registering as a application, never mind any of the other steps. This is obviously because all the stupid temporary ones go to the top of the pile and the rest of us just have to wait.

This is a stupid system. If they just processed them all as they came in there would be no problem. WTF is wrong with this picture?

I am flying to the UK in 6 months. I just hope my passport is ready by then. Some people involved in the procurement of these type of travel documents advised me that I was wise to apply so early as I may only just make it.

Watch this space…

Don’t try to help me, just do what I ask you to do

2007-03-19T14:36:00.001+02:00

So today I asked a colleague to perform a certain financial function for me that I do not have access to on the financial system, which is so simple it should have taken him less than 3 minutes to do it. I needed a credit note against a particular invoice due to an extremely long-winded negotiation with a client that has taken a year to resolve, and has now finally been agreed upon.

All that needed to be done was a credit note to be created for an amount which I specified, and for him to let me know it was done in the system so I could print the note, get a partner to sign it, scan it in and send it to the client. But no. Things are NEVER that simple.

2 hours later he calls me back with a long story about how he cannot reverse the invoice because it is in the previous financial year, and it is only for a part of the amount. Of course it is – this is why I asked for a credit note. The invoice is NOT supposed to be reversed, it is supposed to stand, and only a portion is supposed to be credited.

I explained that to him, in as much detail as I had put into the mail, and he still did not understand.

Now I realise that NOBODY is indispensable, but there are a few people at my office that we simply cannot do without. The person he is replacing is one of them. She is the only person who knows the financial system, and who knows what is going on, and who actually listens to you when you ask her to do something.

She doesn’t try help me by doing something else (assuming I must have used the incorrect term, and substituting another in its place), and she also understands the urgency of things at all times.

One of the things I hate most about the office environment is people who either are completely fecking stupid, or those who try help you by doing something other than what you have asked them to do because they think they are helping you. STOP IT! You are not helping. You are causing a problem and making work for everyone, including yourself.

Think people. Think!

the world is a village, except it is not

2007-02-28T14:36:00.000+02:00

This is a picture of me with my best friend in the whole world at Cape Agulhas - the most southern point of Africa. I met him online 9 months ago. We got chatting, and became fast friends.

Eventually, we decide to come visit me in South Africa, all the way from Ireland, and it was better than either of us hoped. He is a true gentlman, a man of honour, and is my best friend in all the world.

I cried when he left to go back home, and I miss him terribly, but he has invited me to go visit him in Dublin, and I am saving for a ticket. I think I will write the whole story down in the next post, but wanted to put his smiling mug up here to remind me how wonderful life can be.

Although the world is a village in that we can meet online and chat as if we are neighbours, I cannot just pop next door to see him and give him a hug, or go see him for a chat.

Please will someone invent a teleporter really quickly? Pretty Please?

When it is not funny

2007-02-03T22:51:00.000+02:00

There are many different types of humour, depending on where you live in the world, how yuo were brought up, your home language, and how you see the world, but I think we can all agree that humour which is always at someone else's expense is just not funny.

I have a colleauge who thinks he is just sooooooo fecking funny because he goes around insulting people all day long, and passes it off as funny. He then looks for affirmation, and si helluva surprised when he doesn't get it.

I can't decide if he is stupid or just mean-spirited.

Funny is as funny does, or something like it. Surely it not funny to call someone stupid, or see a diary on their desk and ask them if it is the dummy's guide to time management, or if they have a shoe off to ask them what the awful smell is.

Funny is like clever. You can't buy it. No matter where you shop, nor how many times you say the same thing...

New words and phrases

2007-01-22T21:35:00.000+02:00

Fabulous - now to remember them...

New Words for 2007

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE. The fine art of whacking the crap out of an
electronic device to get it to work again.

AEROPLANE BLONDE. One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box

AUSSIE KISS. Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under

GREYHOUND. A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare

MILLENNIUM DOMES. The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing

PICASSO BUM. A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's got four buttocks

SWAMP-DONKEY A deeply unattractive person

TART FUEL. Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women

And just because they're funny..... Old Words for 2006

TESTICULATING. Waving your arms around and talking Bollocks

BLAMESTORMING. Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible

SEAGULL MANAGER. A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves

ASSMOSIS. The process by which people seem to absorb success and
advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard

SALMON DAY. The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die

CUBE FARM. An office filled with cubicles

PRAIRIE DOGGING. When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see that's going on. (This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)

SITCOMs. Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a "home business"

SINBAD. single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate

STRESS PUPPY. A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and
whiny

ADMINISPHERE. The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often
profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed
to solve. This is often affiliated with the dreaded "administrivia" -
needless paperwork and processes

404. Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located

OHNOSECOND. That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that
you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all')

GOING FOR A McSHIT. Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of
buying food, you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff
member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is
known as a McShit with Lies.(we've ALL done this)

BEER COAT. The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3am

BEER COMPASS. The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home
after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you
live, how you got here, and where you've come from

MONKEY BATH. A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you
go:"Oo!Oo!Oo! Aa!Aa!Aa!"

MYSTERY BUS. The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're
in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive
people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in

MYSTERY TAXI. The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning
before you wake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a
10-Pinter in your bed instead

SALAD DODGER. An excellent phrase for an overweight person

Men and bums

2007-01-19T12:10:00.000+02:00

Another thing I know about men for sure (or maybe about my colleague, who represents the typical male) is that when a man walks behind a woman that is what he is thinking. Behind.

He just walked into the office and said, and I quote: “Say what you want, but African women have great asses”.

I asked him who he was referring to and he said he really didn’t care who it was as he wasn’t concentrating on her face at all. In fact, he didn’t even take the time to look at her face. He couldn’t even have told me if he knew who it was; he was completely fixated on her butt.

Just to prove my point, he also looked at my chest this morning, blushed, and said (I kid you not) “no Friday cleavage then? I was looking forward to some cleavage and now you have ruined my day.”

I find it completely amusing that he thinks it is funny to say that right out loud, and secondly that he thinks it is appropriate to say something like that at all in this day and age.

Can you say “sexual harassment”?

Joke of the day (not my original...)

2007-01-19T09:15:00.000+02:00

Men and cleavage

2007-01-18T22:14:00.000+02:00

So, I think there is a compulsive connection between women's breasts and men's eyes. I did a little experiment the other day - I wore a tight-fitting, black, crossover, fairly low cut, revealing t-shirt. Of all the men, one (who I suspect is gay) did not look at my cleavage. The rest looked, almost as if they could not help it. I questioned a few of them on it, and their reply was that if I am going to wear clothes like that then I get what I want, and do they.

Whatever.

I am just totally amused that men in general are so unable to control themselves. It is both amusing, and sad. Poor guys. Imagine being ruled by women so obviously and so impulsively all the time...

I guess I never noticed this before because I have been overweight my whole life, and have only recently noticed that I have a body.

I have lost 43 kilos in the last 3 years, and kept it off. Just a few more to go. woohoo. I am literally half the women I used to be.

Christmas Lunch! Yum

2006-12-25T22:56:00.000+02:00

This year, instead of having the usual (albeit delicious) Mongolian braai, I managed to negotiate a different plan. We had the most delicious roast chicken with cranberry stuffing, roasted vegetables, and roasted potatoes.

We had also planned on having green salad, and red salad. We did so many roasted veggies that we did not make the salads, as there seemed to be quite enough to eat.

We put the chicken into a cooking bag, and surrounded it with the veggies, lightly coated in olive oil, and very sparingly drizzled with honey.

After 2 hours in the oven (the veggies came out a bit before), the chicken was done. The final touch was to put some Dukkah onto the potatoes. We had made our own Dukkah, and it is the most excellent thing ever. It is supposed to be a fragrant Egyptian spice, and MAN is it ever delicious.

We got the base recipe from a book somewhere, but made it our own. You take one cup of oven-roasted almonds, one cup of oven roasted sesame seeds, one third of a cup of coriander seeds, one third of a cup of cumin seeds, and blend it all in a food processor. Then add a quarter teaspoon of flaked sea salt, and you have the best spice in the world.

It is a very subtle yet fragrant flavour that we added liberally to the potatoes.

For festive drinks we made cranberry and soda with ribbons of cucumber and strawberry in them. The looked very merry.

I am going to try upload some pics for you all to see.

The drinks with the cucumber ribbons:

Here is the raw chicken with the delicious-looking veggies before they went in:

Driving lessons 101

2006-10-18T12:21:00.000+02:00

Inspired by being a passenger in my friend's car. !!!!

Lesson 1
Don’t break into a corner. If you have to, break before, but you will have more control of your vehicle if you accelerate into a corner than if you are breaking. Plus, people don’t expect you to slam on anchors for no apparent reason just because there is a corner ahead.

Lesson 2
Always be aware of where cars are around you. This includes those behind you, in front of you, and yes, even next to you. This is so that in the unexpected, yet almost certain to occur event, you know where your escape routes are, and don’t have to start looking when you only have one second to act. The same goes for if you are waiting to be let into traffic. Don’t start looking for gaps on the other side if one side lets you in…

Lesson 3
Be aware of the surface of the road ahead and to the sides of you. Again, this has to do with planning an escape route. ‘nuf said.

Lesson 4
Be aware of the potential danger spots such as side roads where cars will suddenly come out of nowhere into your lane because they can. Perhaps they did see you, perhaps they did not. Even if you were right, you are still dead.

Lesson 5
Expect people to stop for pigeons, dogs, old ladies, and even beetles (imaginary or real) with no reason whatsoever. However, this will be no problem for you if you have kept your following distance. Again, even if you were right, your car still gets bent…

Lesson 6
People will wait until the last minute to go, and will drive out in front of you because they can. Anticipate this. You know it is going to happen.

Lesson 7
Learn to use your breaks properly. Anticipate, and instead of screaming up to an intersection or a group of cars, try just lifting your foot off the accelerator and letting gravity help you. You will find that your petrol bill goes down significantly too.

My Mum has 2 medals that her Dad got for safe driving. Can you imagine that? It seems inconceivable that such things were ever awarded. I bet the people who gave those out are turning in their graves today.

I wanna buy a helicopter

Safe driving...

New neighbours

2006-10-15T23:50:00.000+02:00

I have a new neighbour, which means that my old neighbour is gone. Woohoo! She was a very rude, mean-spirited, and selfish woman, and I am glad she is gone. (I realise that is not really a very good attitude to have, but I don't really care.)

When she moved in, I went to welcome her, and she was rude and obviously did not want to be part of our neighbourhood, or perhaps was not used to being welcomed into a neighbourhood. I would greet her everytime I saw her, but she would either swear at me under her breath, or ignore me flat. I was still friendly to her for the past 2 years, and finally yesterday evening I saw that a new couple had moved in. (I had heard various noises the evening before until 1am, but that was not unusual, so I ignored it.

Anyway, I went to welcome my new neighbours, and they seem like a wonderful couple. I cannot tell you how pleased I am. We have already discussed where the good shops are in the neighbourhood, where the best take away joints are, best routes onto the highways, doctors, vets, etc, and we even have a coffee date. I am also going to help them paint one of their rooms.

Not only are they friendly, but they also don't have a dog. Now, I love animals, and have had various combinations all my life. I currently have a cat. My old neighbour had a dog who used to get out of her yard (because she did not have a gate), and deposit tons and tons of dog poo on my lawn, and chase my cat daily. Despite the complex and body coporeate rules that every place must have a gate if it has animals, she simply did not ever put one up, which meant that her dog could wriggle through my gate which has holes between the slats of the metal. Needless to say, I asked her politely many times, but she would either ignore me, or say "well, that is what dogs do!"

Next to brussel sprouts and cooked oatmeal, dog poo is THE MOST DISGUSTING thing in the world, and I really resent having to pick it up if I don't have a dog.

I considered picking it up and giving it to her weekly, but I was afraid she may hit me. LOL. Never mind, she has gone now.

Thank goodness for new neighbours.

Yaaaaaaaay!

Cretin driver...

2006-10-15T23:49:00.000+02:00

Yesterday, it was raining while I was driving on the highway. Now, while I am the first to admit that the general driver in South Africa is not what I would call a "good" driver, it gets worse when it rains. Even if it only rains a bit. As soon as the roads become even vaguely slick, people forget how to drive completely (that is if they ever knew how in the first place!), and somehow, people drive even closer behind you, and faster than they do when their tyres grip on the road is more solid.

Case in point: yesterday, I watched helplessly as a man in a white bakkie (you may call it a truck or a utility vehicle, depending on which part of the world you live in) came speeding up behind me, oblivious to the fact that all three lanes of traffic were driving at only 30KPH due to the poor visibility and rain. He came belting along, and suddenly saw me. He slammed on anchors, and I could see that he was going to hit me, so I tried to calmly move forward into the space I had left in front of me, but I knew it would not be enough, and I braced myself for the impact.

At the last possible moment, he swerved out and hit the barrier in the middle of the island. Now you have to understand. I have what may be called an overactive imagination. In my mind, it all happened in slow motion, and I could see it as if it were a cartoon, happening with the stars, the smoke escaping out of the bonnet, and everything. Even the sound of the impact had a quasi-cartoon sound to it. I really should not have laughed, and perhaps it was the release of the tension and adrenalin, but I burst out laughing. I still laugh now at the thought of picture on my mind. Luckily, he was not injured at all, and there was little damage to his car.

Thank goodness.

All I can say is I have ABS breaks, and he does not. I guess that's what the barrier is for. Poor guy. Perhaps he will pay closer attention next time.

Dodged a bullet. Here's to the next dodge...

Sleeping...

2006-10-15T23:48:00.000+02:00

A friend of mine says that sleeping is a waste of time. She says that time you spend sleeping is time lost, and that you never get that time back.

Firstly – Duh! Secondly, how can it be a waste of time if your body is healing, regenerating, and relaxing? Thirdly, when else do you get to dream? I know some of you said you don’t dream, or don’t remember your dreams, and some dreams are bad dreams, but some dreams are good dreams.

In the words of Ralph Wiggum (from the Simpsons) “Oh boy sleep. That’s where I’m a Viking!” I find the moments just before wakefulness to be among the most pleasant, specially if it is cold out. Your body is still asleep, and warm, but your mind is just starting to wake up.

I don’t consider sleep a waste of time, but I do consider ironing a waste of time. Your clothes do look much better on you when they are ironed, there is no question about that, but soon, they get all wrinkly again. What’s the point of doing something that will get undone and need to be redone soon?If they can send a man to the Moon, and a car to Mars to collect Mars rocks, why can’t they create linen that is wrinkle-proof?

What do you consider to be a waste of time?

Fecking big spider

2006-10-15T23:46:00.000+02:00

28 Sept 2006
This morning, as I got to my office, the usual round up of dust bunnies, viruses creeping around the aircon machine, and dead leaves on the plant greeted me, but I also had an additional visitor. Reading the sage words of Zen advice on keeping your head when all around you are failing (you know, things such as no one is listening until you fart…) was an adolescent baboon spider. I looked at him in surprise, and he looked at me as if I was a piece of mouldy cheese.

After trying to get hold of any men at work who would be willing to help us get rid of the spider (and yes, they were all too scared to do it) I phoned my brother, described it to him, and fond out that it was most likely a Baboon spider which is not venomous. He suggested just patting it from behind with my hand, and letting it walk onto my other hand (yeah right!) and dropping it gently out the window onto a branch.

I got a long ruler, and a big piece of cardboard (hands - I don't think so), and as I was about to do "le manoeuvre", the cleaning lady jostled me out of the way, and hit it with a brush into a bucket of warm water, and threw it and the water out of the window.

Oh well.

Now for the crux of the matter… You may have read in a previous post that my middle brother (the one who I phoned in this piece) used to keep Baboon Spiders as pets. I do remember that we used to hold them and play with them. I was a lot younger then, and I guess what they say about the young having no fear is true, because I was scared today. Scared the spider would run up my arm and onto my head, scared it would bite me, scared it would be sore, scared of I don’t even know what. The point is, there was a time when I would not have thought twice about doing it. The proof of this is below in my oldest brother’s email response.Names and email addresses have been erased to protect my anonymity.

------------
You're such a poofter. I recall a time when you and xxx were holding the tarantulas. I had to do it too, cause face was at stake.
xxx

Benefits of an office...

2006-10-15T23:44:00.000+02:00

25 Sept 2006

I figured out today that I don't have a sore back, and that I an not walking hunched over on the left side.I realised it is because I have been leaving my piles of books and papers in the office.You may think this is a normal thing to do, but when you work from the client, and a different client site every day, you get to carry all your crap with you.

Now, let's be realistic. We are supposed to be working in a paperless office environment. Ha ha. Don't even get me started on that. You have to print stuff out so that the bosses can read it, proof it, change it, sign it, and then copy it.I do scan most of my stuff, but all client documents and boss documents must be paper-based. I end up carrying at least 10 kilograms of paper with me every day in my work bag, along with my laptop. I eventually invested in a backpack type so that the weight would be evenly distributed over both shoulders, but I never use it that way. I end up carrying it all on my right shoulder, and this has caused me to walk funny.

Perhaps I always did, but it also give me backache.I didn't realise how bad it was until we got an office two weeks ago. I now officially have a place to put my stuff overnight, and leave my things on a desk where I know they will be safe until I return the next day (if I know that I am not going to the client first thing in the morning).Usually, we worked on the premise of hot desks - which is a good method, except if you have multiple documents that need to be filed and stored for legal purposes. My boot (trunk for the Americans) is full of client approvals, sign-off documents, and such. It would be a helluva thing if my car was ever stolen.

But now, we have an office, and I can store the stuff there.It is also a good thing because I can leave my heavy files and papers there overnight, just bringing my laptop home every day.

My back thanks the powers that be, and I thank them too. I am sure that the auditors will too if and when they need to see all project documentation.Who knows, maybe we will get a printer on the same floor that is not half a day's walk away, but i am not holding my breath...Woohoo!

Stop and throw the roses... at the passers by

2006-10-15T23:42:00.000+02:00

My car broke down in rush hour traffic this evening. Damn annoying. However, it was at a stop street, so things could have been worse. At least I was not in the middle of the intersection.

The gradient of the road was quite steep, so there was no chance of me pushing the car to the side on my own, and i think i can't have been flashing enough leg because it took ages for anyone to stop and help me.

I put my hazard lights on, and phoned for help, but in the 20 minutes that I waited, I observed the following - I think you will it as interesting as I did.

At least 120 cars drove past me.
2 stopped and offered help.
5 hooted at me in annoyance as if I was doing something wrong.
5 flashed lights at me from behind in annoyance as if I was doing something wrong.
3 cars (ladies I must admit) stopped behind me and waited for me to go, realising about 3 minutes later that I had my hazard lights on...)
7 cars from across the intersection who were turning flashed lights at me to indicate that I could go in front of them (I guess they could not see my hazards either!!)
Lastly, significantly less than half of the cars from behind me noticed more than 2 - 3 meters away that I had my hazard lights on and changed lanes before they were so close they had to wait before they could.And I forgot to mention the best bit - A police Car drove past me too.

I get stopped all the time and have to show my license, but when I need help, they don't stop me.

SIGH.

This is an extraordinary comment on how we drive.

Not always what you think...

2006-10-15T23:41:00.000+02:00

Okay, another joke, but this was funny enough to post.

Bob wakes up with a huge hangover the night after a business function.He forces himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!

Bob sits up in bed and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Bob looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror and notices a note on the table: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping - Love you!!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Bob asks, "Son... what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 am, drunk and out of your mind. You broke the coffee table, puked in the hallway and got that black eye when you ran into the door."So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose and breakfast is waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh, THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, bitch, I'm married!!!"

THe philosophy of hte Open Hand...

2006-10-15T23:40:00.000+02:00

Have you ever heard that you can trap a monkey with a closed cage and a piece of fruit? The illustration is somewhat over-simplified, but perfectly illustrates the philosophy of the Philosophy of the Open Hand. Let me explain. If you put a delicious piece of fruit, such a banana, or a melon inside a cage with bars just wide enough for a monkey to slip his hand between to reach the fruit, he will grab it, and try to get it out. However, he will not be able to, as he will not let the fruit go to get his hand out of the cage. Thus, he finds himself on the horns of a dilemma. If he lets go, he does not have the fruit, but if he does not let go, cannot be free. Poor little monkey, torn between freedom and greed. Perhaps another illustration from another angle will help to make the point.

Consider that your life is like a glass filled with water. The glass represents your ability to give, receive, and hold "stuff" (money, love, ideas, time, kind words, and so on), and the water is the "stuff" you have. Of course, the bigger the glass, the more you can hold, but essentially, all humans have a similar-sized glass. (Bitterness can cause your glass to crack and break, but that is another post for another time).

Now, every person is born empty, and every person is taught (to a greater or lesser degree) by their families / environment / surroundings / friends / etc how to give and receive "stuff", and some are better at this process than others. Some seem to have an innate ability to do this, while for others it seems to be more difficult.

While some people also have a gift to make "stuff", there is a caveat. You can only receive "stuff" if there is space in your glass, and you can only make space in your glass if you empty your glass. Guess what? You can only empty your glass by giving "stuff" away to others.

It is really very simple. You can only have someone pour something into your glass if it has space, and there will only be space if you have poured some of your own out into someone else's - by giving something away. Here is my challenge to Blogville: Catch someone doing something right today, not only in Blogville, but in RL too. See what a difference smiling at someone can make. Seems silly, but it's true. Another side effect is that you may even feel better about yourself...

Think Bike

2006-10-15T23:38:00.000+02:00

There is an ever-increasing number of bikes on our roads, and I have started noticing that the cars are becoming more and more tolerant (or perhaps just aware) of them. Despite the few drivers (women, I must admit) who don’t see them, and can tend to change lanes directly in front of them causing them to pull front wheelies and make all kinds of hand signs at the drivers; the four wheel drivers on the whole are learning to share the road with their two wheel counter-parts.

I have noticed that bikes have the best of all worlds. If the traffic is backed up, bikes can wriggle their way through the lanes and keep moving through the gaps where the cars cannot. Bikes can park in much smaller spaces than cars; bikes can go from zero to ridiculous in like 2 seconds, where most cars cannot; bikes use much less fuel – and let’s face it, it is not getting any cheaper! Bikes are somehow more mobile than cars, and seem to have a whole culture surrounding them. Bikes represent a whole other world to me – a freedom, an ideal, - a nebulous concept I cannot define in words. Something to do with speed, the open road, just you and your wits against everything else (including cars who don’t always see you), an element of danger I guess.

Have you ever owned a bike? Do you currently? Do you wanna?

I may be getting one soon, watch this space...

Hollywood White?

2006-10-15T23:36:00.000+02:00

My friend is considering paying over four grand to have her teeth Zoom whitened. I don’t think she needs it, but I guess it’s not up to me. It is the code of the old West – a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do (or woman in this case). I read somewhere that your teeth will never (naturally) be whiter than the whites of your eyes.But surely there is a better way to get whiter teeth than paying so much?

Until a few years ago, toothbrushes were like computer keyboards – there was only really one basic model. Then all of a sardine, there were many different types – with an indicator to let you know when to change it; mixing bristle types on the same brush to maximise the gum massaging and plaque reaching ability of the brush; battery-powered toothbrushes with tiny round heads that were supposed to be the answer to the answer to the world’s teeth cleaning problems, and most recently, there are two types in particular that have caught my eye.

There is the Aquafresh 3-Way Head system which “adapts to the contours of your teeth to effectively remove plaque by reaching along the gum line 5X better* (the * says laboratory testing versus standard flat trim brush)”. Audience: Oooooooh.Then there is the other new Colgate brush (don’t have the advert in front of me) which has sonic pulses - supposed to loosen the plaque and provide a better all round cleaning. This brush takes one AAA battery, and indicator bristles.Both of these brushes seem to work very well, and I am sure that if used morning and evening, as prescribed by most dentists, you should not have any problems with your teeth.

Here are some tips I came across (translation – lifted from some mag) to keep your teeth white:
>rinse your mouth out with water half an hour after eating anything with a high sugar content
>Sugar content can strip enamel from your teeth – cut down on fruit juice and fizzy drinks, or drink them with a straw
>Red wine and coffee leave behind microscopic residues that cannot be easily brushed away, and can stain your teeth
>Brush your twice at least twice a day, and floss once a day to ensure that you keep your teeth clean and free from plaque build-up

The Lady of hte house...

2006-10-15T23:32:00.000+02:00

11 Aug 2006

Lady Ashford

That is the name of my cat, and always requires some explanation. I got her from the SPCA, and she was THE most scruffy-looking, the thinnest, the saddest, and most pathetic looking cat they had. But she was also the most beautiful, in her own way. She is a tortoise shell in her colouring, and has pale green eyes. She has a very soft purr, and talks a lot. All in all, a splendid specimen of a cat.

But, when I first got her, she looked to wretched and thin, that I could not help but adopt her. I looked at all the cats in the cages, and considered carefully which I was going to bring home to love. I wanted a kitten, but they had none. Then I saw her. She seemed to be what I would imagine your typical battered and abandoned cat to be – hungry, unkempt, and scruffy. So far from royalty that I decided she needed a regal name. Little did I know that she obviously owned a house and people before. In a very short period of time, with constant love, brushing, and good food, she had become the very picture of health and beauty. Only problem was, she went from 2 kilograms to 5 and a half within a few months. Now she can hardly fit through the cat door LOL.

I have spoken to my neighbours and asked them not to feed her, but they do. I know this because I have her on diet food, but she is still as fat as ever. She is not unhealthily fat as I can still feel her ribs, and she can jump, and run, and climbs my tree right to the top to catch birds (which she gives to me as presents!), so she is not house-bound at all.

They say people who have animals tend to be less stressed than those who don’t. I think that is true, and the amount of laughter she brings into the house is great. For as small as she is, she can take up the whole couch, and will often not leave space for me to sit. If I move her, she will express her disdain at being disturbed.

She also spends hours in the garden chasing the other cats away, and grovelling in the sand. Once I saw her almost red all over from the red sand in one corner of the garden. But she always takes time to groom herself and her white patches are as clean as ever when she has finished.

Guess she really is a lady after all.